"Ching Chong Ling Long Ting Tong Oooh!" UCLA Babe in Hot Water for Mocking Asians on YouTube. Why Doesn't Rush Slimebaugh Get the Same Treatment?

Her name is Alexandra Wallace (who apparently goes by "Allie" when she bikini models), and the third-year UCLA political science student is in all kinds of trouble for her YouTube video this week (watch down below) that mocks the way Asians talk.

In the video, she also criticizes Japanese students for trying to call Japan from the school library to check in on relatives in the wake of the terrible earthquake and tsunami (or as Wallace refers to it, "the whole tsunami thing"). For good measure, she blasts the students for being "these hordes of Asian people" whom, she says, UCLA shouldn't have accepted for admission in such large numbers in the first place! (Link to full story at bottom).

Methinks "Allie" might just want to stick to the modeling gig, because she doesn't appear to have a lot going for herself upstairs except for those mammalian protruberances she exhibits in her modeling pics (which pair, truth be told, ain't all that great either – although her YouTube video looks like she has recently artificially enhanced -- look out you don't get attacked by a snake). Check out some more from the zany rant that this nuclear chemist stuck on YouTube:

"I'll be in, like, deep into my studying, into my political science theories and arguments and all that stuff, getting it all down, like, typing away furiously, blah, blah, blah, and then all of a sudden, when I'm about to, like, reach an epiphany, overhear from somewhere, 'Oh ching chong ling long ting tong, ooohh!' "

Somehow I find it hard to believe that this NASA scientist gets too "deep" into much of anything except perhaps KFC 20-piece tubs, given her changed appearance and apparent weight gain on the YouTube video as compared with her modeling photos. She continues on in her rant:

"I swear they're going through their whole families just checking on everybody from the whole tsunami thing. I mean, I know, okay, that sounds horrible, like, I feel bad for all people affected by the tsunami, but if you're going to go call your address book, you might as well go outside, because if something is wrong, you might really freak out if you're in the library and everybody is quiet."

You gotta love that last part! If you're going to "freak out" at tragic news, then take it outside, please, because otherwise you're going to disturb my so-called "studying"!

Wallace has reportedly apologized in a statement to the campus newspaper, but has been receiving "numerous death threats." Boy, that's nice. Responding to some harmless ditzy bigot broad by threatening to kill her! Slimeballs.

A few remaining observations: First, of course Wallace's statements are wrong, bigoted, insensitive and inappropriate. But why is this college student national news, whereas when deranged right-winger Rush Slimebaugh recently similarly mocked the way Asians speak, there was nary a protest nationwide?

I guess it's because people (even leftists) think that since Slimebaugh is always saying crazy things, this example from him was just par for the course. Sort of old news, you might say. Well, I think that's pathetic. Wallace is a young college student who did something dumb, has apologized, and is now paying a terrible price for it. In contrast, Slimebaugh reaches millions and millions of people with his silliness. So where's the equal outrage when such a high profile figure as him does this kind of foolishness?

And a final note (because I hate to bash the right-wingers without a little equal time and equal opportunity for our loony leftist 20-percenter friends): I see a quote from the UCLA Chancellor, "Gene D. Block," reacting to Wallace's video by stating, "Like many of you, I recoil when someone invokes the right of free expression to demean other individuals or groups."

Spoken like a true liberal leftist. Where did Wallace ever purport to "invoke the right of free expression" in anything she said? She didn't. And so why is 20-percenter Chancellor even mentioning that topic in the context of this video, unless he's of the common leftist belief that free expression rights really aren't all that important -- just a little pesky thing to be tolerated here and there when the leftists feel like it?

And BTW, there, Chancellor, Wallace had every damn right in the world to say the stuff she said, no matter how stupid it was. Why would you even bring up the First Amendment here? I too "recoil" at the thought -- the thought of someone like you having this young gal's fate in your hands. "Recoil," indeed, Mr. Chancellor.

http://www.cbsnews.com/stories/2011/03/15/national/main20043230.shtml?tag=dis

http://www.nydailynews.com/news/national/2011/03/15/2011-03-15_alexandra_wallace_ucla_student_who_ranted_against_asians_receives_death_threats_.html?r=news

That's Gotta Smart: "Snake Dies of Silicone Poisoning After Biting Girl on Her [Fake] Boob"! 1st Question: Why Was She Letting a Snake Bite Her Rack?

She's busty Israeli model Orit Fox. And this bosomy braintrust was on Spanish TV channel "Telecino," apparently engaging in some sort of crude snake dance. She should probably leave that sort of thing to Clint Eastwood's buddy, Chief Big Eagle, since the serpent promptly tried to take a big bite (literally) out of one of Fox's big fake cans (video and link to full story down below).

He was a regular snake on the lass, you might say. Reports Britain's Sun: "She was clutching the tame reptile and went to lick its face when the snake took offense and chomped down on her surgically-enhanced bosom."

Actually, Fox is lucky the raunchy reptile didn't try to sink his teeth into that big tongue she was waggin' at him. And what did this slimy snake get for his efforts? A nice shot of silicone down the ol’ gullet and a quick death thereafter. Which makes this an odd variation of the "man bites dog" story, since here we had a human injecting lethal poison from its body into a snake.

As for this rocket scientist Fox, she's reportedly going to be just fine. EMTs reportedly followed the speed limit in taking Fox to the hospital (since cops, firefighters and EMTs hate it when you say they "raced" or "rushed" somewhere – which is illegal, even for them).

Down at the sick bay, this snake-gropin' sick-o was given a tetanus shot and sent packing. No word yet how much silicone was still left in the huge fake boob after the snake got through with it or whether that big breast is even still usable anymore for serpent sashays.

http://www.thesun.co.uk/sol/homepage/news/3466265/Snake-dies-after-biting-girls-breast.html

They Got This One-Year-Old Punk "All Liquored Up! All F*cked Up on Alcohol!"

Actually, that's a line from Susie Essman's vile, foul-mouthed character on "Curb Your Enthusiasm" after Larry David accidentally gets her 7-something daughter drunk on wine. But it seems to be precisely what some people at a recent baseball game did too, only this time with a one-year-old! (Links to story at bottom/video at top).

Apparently, it's quite the YouTube sensation video at the moment: Adults giving a Miller Lite brewsky to this little 1-year-old screwball. As the little tike downs the beer, the adults erupt into a wild chorus of inane laughter and catcalls, with one screaching, "You Got All Dat?!" (it's "THAT" BTW) and some dorky dude screaming, "WHOA!!!"

I thought I'd heard this sad chapter in human history before when we saw the video a year or two ago of the 3-year-old punk downing a beer bottle at a Phillies game (as pictured immediately below Susie Essman above), but this one takes the cake: This little rotten character is only 1-year-old for Jeezal Peezal sake! What did these so-called adults do after he chugged his beer? -- Offer him a cigarette?!

http://www.cbsnews.com/8301-504784_162-20041313-10391705.html?tag=cbsnewsLeadStoriesAreaMain

http://www.wtsp.com/news/watercooler/story.aspx?storyid=180164&catid=58

http://www.rickey.org/?p=42724

Did Bubba Clinton Completely Ruin This Young Lady's Life? Or Did "That Woman" Just Blow It?

…Blow her life, that is. This story from Britain's Daily Mail is from a few days ago, but I haven't seen the American media paying too much attention to it (huge surprise there): It reports that Monica Lewinsky is still head over heels in love with Bill Clinton – still crazy after all these years, you might say, just like the song. (Link to full story at bottom).

Lewinsky, of course, was the just 22-year-old White House intern when she first blew the horn of the 50-year-old dirty old man and Charlie Sheen hero, President Clinton. Lewinsky – by my reckoning the first person in American pop culture history to have the act of fellatio nicknamed after her ("she gave him a Lewinsky") – even spoke into Clinton's mike right there in the middle of the Oval Office!

Then this unofficial alum of Oral Roberts made the mistake of blabbing about the affair to co-worker Linda Tripp, who recorded their phone conversations concerning Lewinsky's dirty act of giving Scully to the nation's top knob.

Tripp turned the Gobble Gobble taped account over to independent prosecutor Kenneth Starr, who had a fellatio field day with the Oralgamie-In-Chief Clinton. Then the Prominent Proponent of the Penile Tonsil Hockey Clinton looked the American people right in eye, under oath, with his finger waggin' right in our face, and spouted his now infamous, "I did not have sexual relations with THAT woman!"

Starr eventually hauled the pink oboe playin' Lewinsky into court for her side of the calf feedin' occurrences. The yogurt cannon yafflin' Lewinsky then shook up the world with accounts of semen-stained blue dresses and one of the civilized world's first recorded "oral" accounts of the utilization of a cigar as a makeshift dildo.

The republican-controlled U.S. House later impeached bojo jobber Clinton for lying under oath, although the whaps-gettin' president kept his job when things stalled out in the Senate trial.

Clinton ultimately admitted having an "improper relationship" with the cheese eatin' Lewinsky, but he never admitted much of anything else, including any description that had the word "sex" or "sexual" in it.

And to think I actually voted for "that man" in 1992 (the only time in my life, BTW, that I've ever voted for a democrat party candidate or republican for president). Just shoot me. Really though. Or consider giving me a pass: I was only 21, ignorant, and still under the influence of the entire leftist indoctrination from college and earlier. But I digress.

That lying slimeball, Clinton. Own up to what happened after the fact, and I could have easily gotten past the affair. But look me in the eye and lie about it and wag your finger at me, and then thereafter never fully admit it, then I'm going to call you a sleazejob.

And when I say he's a sleazejob, I mean he "is" a scumjacket, as opposed to merely asserting that he "is" a mere creep. And if you ask me to define the term "is," I promise to clock ya one right in the kisser. But I digress again.

So that brings us to the 37-year-old Lewinsky of today, who lives in L.A. This bonophone talkin' dame reportedly claims to friends that she has never married or had kids because she is still in love and always will be with the cone-gettin' Clinton.

The Lewinsky-givin' Lewinsky also reportedly tells friends that she's never gotten over her brain salad surgery mate Clinton and "would take him back in a second."

This oralizing ice cream aficionado Lewinsky further waxes poetic to friends, reportedly, that she "still carries a flame" for the cigar-rollin' ex-president and has "never been able to get Bill out of her heart."

To think, Lewinsky could have been the much-more-attractive-than-Hillary hummer that just kept hummin', but Bubba felt it more important to lie about it and stay with his battle axe left-wing partisan hag of a spouse. But folks perplexed by the meaning of the English language's "to be" infinitive do tend to be mentally challenged like that.

http://www.dailymail.co.uk/news/article-1365046/Im-love-Bill-Friends-say-Monica-Lewinsky-got-married-kids.html?ito=feeds-newsxml

Never Let a Good Crisis Go to Waste: Crazy Cali Surfer Dudes, Woodies in Tow, "Waited in Water for Tsunami"!

What's next, skydivers jumping into tornadoes? Instead of "Big Wednesday," it was Big Friday: Reports from California say that surfers there took advantage of high water from the tsunami caused by the terrible Japanese earthquake in order to catch a few (massive) waves! (Pictures above/link to full story at bottom).

Reports say these crazy kooks were absolutely stoked when they saw the gnarly tsunami warnings on TV Thursday night. They loaded up their woodies and hung ten towards the nearest coastline – some driving hours to get there.

At the beaches on Friday, these radical riptiders hit the waters faster than a Chinese wax job at Dead Man's Curve. These Bra Boys were so anxious to get their goofy foot on that they actually turtle rolled right over all the warnings from cops and lifeguards to eschew the wild incoming surf.

No time for Beach Blanket Bingo on this day. Not by a longshot. These wetsuited wipe-outs were just itchin' to get Out in the Soup faster than an Andy Warhol inspiration at a Watusi hop headlined by Jan & Dean.

Luckily, from reports and from the pictures, it appears that the woodies carrying the beach boys' surfboards didn't arrive too far behind the T-Birds and Little Deuce Coupes that transported these Liquid Time lovin' Lords of Dogtown to the wild awaiting waters along the coast. As you can see, they had their boards in hand as the tsunami turned Surf City into a Surfin' Safari.

No word yet whether these epic tubular sensations screamed "Cowabunga" as the tsunami hit, but if ever there was a time…

http://hosted.ap.org/dynamic/stories/U/US_TSUNAMI_SURFERS?SITE=AP&SECTION=HOME&TEMPLATE=DEFAULT&CTIME=2011-03-11-11-50-50
http://www.nypost.com/p/news/national/southern_california_surfers_await_cIT8Q37kTU9xdAHj89FmNO

A New Meaning for "The Munchies": "U.S Pot Growers Use Alligator to Protect Stash." Here Are Two Ways These Alleged Paca Lolo Potheads Went Wrong...

Forget the watchdog – these alleged dope fiends will hit ya with a gator if you try coming around their "joint": Cali cops this week say they found a $1.5 million Ganja-growing operation (pictured on right) at a local compound that was being guarded by an alligator! (Links to full story at bottom).

Cops says the reptile's name was "Wally the Watchgator," and that he alone garnered watch duty around his alleged Hog Leg owners' weed compound, serving (allegedly) as the primary protection for some 2,300 Mary Jane vines.

When cops busted out this alleged La La Limbo "joint" this week, they subdued and seized the gator and chomped him off to a Cali animal sanctuary since the Bayou reptile is highly illegal to own as a pet in the Land of Fruits & Nuts.

Cops were also chomping at the proverbial bit to throw the book at compound resident, 29-year-old John Nathan Donna. He got sent to the pokey on Mr. J cultivation and possession charges, although he bonded out for a little more than 420 -- a hundred grand to be exact.

OK, so as teased, here are the two ways in which the allegedly Kind Bud Onion Lovin' inhabitants of this compound went way off track in their little security efforts: First – DUDES: At least get a FULL-SIZE gator to safeguard your stash!!! Little Wally was reportedly a midget gator, measuring in at a mere four feet long! (A picture of some dork holding the little guy is above).

Second, GET A DAMN CROCODILE if you want to Jib the potential jokers looking to heist your Jay! Alligators are wusses. They're afraid of humans and will only act aggressively towards a man if they feel cornered. Crocodiles, in contrast, represent a very different animal, both literally and figuratively.

A crocodile has no fear of a man, and will actually actively stalk and hunt a man for a meal if he feels like it. Put in simple terms – (1) Alligator watchdog: won't do $hit to protect your stash unless the burglar happens to actually step on the alligator; versus (2) Crocodile watchdog: Will be proactive and start hunting the burglar as soon as the Croc gets a whiff of the bozo being on the property!

Oh well. Stupid criminals (allegedly).

http://www.dailymail.co.uk/news/article-1364627/Watchgator-Four-foot-long-alligator-protecting-1-5million-drug-stash.html?ito=feeds-newsxml
http://www.cbsnews.com/stories/2011/03/09/ap/strange/main20041161.shtml?tag=cbsnewsSectionContent.12http://www.thevalleychronicle.com/articles/2011/03/10/news/doc4d79480866411157648705.txt

OUCH! Obama's Job Approval Rating Among Independents Crashes 10 Percentage Points in the Past Month...

…These numbers are from a new poll this week by Reuters/Ipsos (link to full story at bottom). The democrat party and Obama alike hate these kinds of numbers, because they know full well that my fellow Independents, who represent about 40% of the country, decide all of the partisans' election outcomes. And they know full well that Obama's little dishonest "moderate" act helped garner enough Independent votes (not mine) to sweep him into office in 2008 and will be equally crucial to his 2012 chances.

Specifically, the new poll reports that Obama's job approval ratings among Independents took a "sharp dive" over the past month, to a rather pathetic 37% from 47%. When Obama feigned a "move to center" act after the 2010 midterm elections and "compromised" with republicans in late 2010 on an extension of current income tax rates across the board, His Majesty's polls numbers went up a bit in the last few months with Independents.

But it's good to see that Majesty's completely disingenuous "march to the center" has started to ring rather hollow with my fellow Independents. Pollsters are chalking up Obama's plunge with the Independents solely to higher gas prices recently. Of course that's a factor, but the only one? Please.

I'm sure the Big Collapse has had absolutely nothing to do with the utterly pathetic 2011 budget that Obama offered up recently which does truly nothing to make a significant dent in our current $14.2 Trillion Dollar National Debt, nor to the historically record-breaking and massive deficits that the 20 percenter leftists have been running up the past few years – officially making equally awful president W Bush look like a penny pinchin' miserly figure (a very difficult task) by comparison.

[I get the sense that Obama's much alleged and maligned lack of action and wavering on the Egyptian and Libyan situations may have also cut into his numbers a bit, although you won't hear me pounding him on those issues: I have to say that Obama's obvious reluctance to initiate American military involvement on the Libyan situation is something that I, so far, support. Don't put our boys at risk unless we have one hell of a good reason for doing so. And so far, Libya ain't it!]

BTW, I almost said the national debt was $14.1 trillion just now, but being the prudent, responsible blogger that I am, I made a quick visit over to the U.S National Debt Clock (a wonderful website – http://www.usdebtclock.org/). There, I quickly realized that we've in recent days surpassed $14.2 trillion in national debt – with the extra point-one trillion representing little more than an extra 100 Billion Dollars being tossed into the kitty of national debt which, on the whole, very much threatens the end of this wonderful country as we know it inside of 10 years.

A few other observations from the Reuters polling numbers: First, I see that that the number of people who think the country is on the wrong track now stands at 64 percent. Significantly, that's the highest that number has stood at any point during Obama’s disastrous leftist presidency.

Finally, I see a reference in the linked story to the contention that Obama has been able to grow his Independent approval ratings (until this month, at least) with post-2010 midterm speeches that give a ton of lip service to finding "common ground" and "the need for compromise in Washington, the kind of rhetoric that [allegedly] appeals to Independents."

Do generalized references to "compromise" and "common ground" truly register positively with you, my fellow Independents? I think it surely does with some of you, but I'd question just how many. Here's my thing: How can you even answer a polling question that in the abstract asks if you positively view such concepts as "compromising more" or "finding common ground"?

I would refuse to answer such a polling question. How in the hell can you speak to the merits of a "compromise" or "finding common ground" unless you have in front of you what the specific "compromise" is that's been reached? Because finding "compromise" or "common ground" simply for the sake of doing so is the realm of the mindless mealy-mouth.

Stand for something. Reach a position on a particular issue, whether it come out on the right, left or somewhere in between. Then ponder that position in contrast to a particular "compromise" that has actually been reached. Then decide whether the "compromise" is acceptable or not. I have no earthly idea how that can be done in the vacuum of stupid questions about whether "compromise" and "finding common ground" are good concepts in the abstract.

Sometimes it's necessary and/or advisable to compromise and find common ground, but other times it's much more prudent, principled and right to stick to your guns. Every situation is different. Short concise bottom line: If you go around celebrating "compromise" and "finding common ground" as if those are somehow wonderful principles to always pursue and achieve, then you really should reconsider and re-evaluate. Because that thought process is about as ignorant as being an ideological, blinded partisan.

http://www.reuters.com/article/2011/03/09/us-obama-poll-idUSTRE7284SZ20110309

Have You Seen This Little League Lovin' Cougar? If So, Make a Call to the Bullpen. Oh, and Hide the Kids as Well…

While it's generally thought to be rather inhumane to lock children in a dog kennel, it might be the best suggestion if you spot 43-year-old Denise Harvey (pictured above) on the loose in your town. At least then, the kids would be safe. And whatever you do: Keep them away from that ball diamond!

Harvey (of Vero Beach, Florida) was previously convicted for repeatedly finding her sweet spot and having sex with her son's 16-year-old friend and teammate from the local high school baseball team.

Now Harvey's reportedly on the lam to foul territory following a February 25 deadline to turn herself in to start serving her 30-year bit in the pokey. She took her ball and left home, you might say.

After her conviction, Harvey was let out of the can on a $150,000 bond while she tried to have her conviction thrown out at second base. But with her appeals now being exhausted, this daisy cuttin' dame was supposed to report for freezer duty by February 25. She never showed up.

Prosecutors say that Harvey's now on the run faster than a Stephen Strasburg heater, and she could be anywhere. Better put a tarp over the ball field, a lock on the stadium gate, and call Dog the Bounty Hunter.

You can't really say this ballpark cougar has played the smartest or best baseball during the course of her criminal case – no spot in Cooperstown for her. First she rejected a plea deal that would have given her around 11 years in the hoosegow – a veritable free pass.

But instead of taking the intentional walk, this hardballin' hussy won the Triple Crown -- 30 years in the joint -- by forcing prosecutors to take the case to trial. That's gotta hurt worse than a 95 mph beanball right to the melon.

And now Harvey's looking at even more years being tacked on to her time in the ice house for her current little home run trot.

"She never acknowledged she had sex. She continued to deny, deny," said one of the prosecutors. And apparently this base knock broad's not the only one in denial. At her trial, Harvey's hubby testified that his wife "was just trying to counsel a troubled boy."

But somehow I think the only "counseling" this big fly bimbo could ever give would be a course on hitting illegal home runs, Sammy Sosa-style.

Harvey's conviction, BTW, came after she hit for the cycle and then some. Specifically, prosecutors say this horny head of lettuce got into scoring position and then rounded third base and headed home five different times with the 16-year-old ball player. (Not quite what Yogi Berra had in mind when he spouted, "déjà vu all over again").

It wasn't exactly what you'd call an innocent game of pepper. This occurred on various occasions "between her work and his baseball games or attending athletic events."

The 16-year-old victim testified at trial that things led off with a long make-out session in a car in front of the high school, and the rally only got bigger from there – sometimes involving Harvey capturing the pennant after putting on the squeeze play in her own office, while other times she'd take a curtain call after hitting a grand slam at the kid's home.

Any place that was private, I suppose – "hit 'em where they ain't," as they say. Just watch out you don't get caught stealing on the next pitch.

http://www.tcpalm.com/news/2011/mar/07/denise-harvey-now-fugitive-vero-beach-underage-sex/
http://www.tcpalm.com/news/2008/aug/28/denise-harvey-gets-30-years-having-sex-teen/http://www.tcpalm.com/news/2008/aug/29/woman-gets-30-years-in-sex-case/