Sunday, June 20, 2010

Look at This Crazy Old Coot in Rural Missouri.

Today’s Kansas City Star reports on the odd saga of one David Jungerman, who owns a farm along U.S. 71 in Bates County, Missouri (about an hour south of Kansas City). The 72-year-old seems very proficient in finding the headlines, and I’ll spare you all of his rather entertaining back story (link to the full story at bottom). The Latest: It seems Jungerman has seen fit to paint and display a tractor-trailer along the heavily traveled highway with the following message: “Are you a Producer or Parasite; Democrats - Party of Parasites.”

Vandals have twice tried to burn down the trailer (which sits on Jungerman’s property), as well as setting fire to an empty farmhouse on the property. Jungerman claims that he’s not even much of a staunch republican, occasionally voting for dems such as Claire McCaskill. He says his message is not aimed at the local “Harry Truman” (more conservative) democrats, but rather dems nationwide.

Now, do I agree with Jungerman’s over-the-top message that lumps together all dems everywhere in one huge swath? Not at all. Frankly, it’s the kind of superficial, sound-bitish, rather mindless type of rhetoric which dems and repubs use all the time and which serves very little constructive purpose. And for the record, I have little doubt that there are plenty of "parasitic" type people to go around in both of our illustrious national political parties.

But that said, Jungerman has every right to express his message and to plaster it on his property. If you don’t like it, then get your own damn trailer and stick your own message on it. Or, you can just be a slimeball like the people who have attacked Jungerman’s property with criminal acts of felony arson. Whatever floats your boat, I suppose.

http://www.kansascity.com/2010/06/19/2029960/missouri-mans-incendiary-sign.html

Saturday, June 19, 2010

Bad Times for Big Hugo.

A new Reuters story this weekend details the mounting problems in Venezuela for everyone's favorite deranged socialist dictator, Hugo Chavez. Those problems include:

-"Mountains of rotting food" at government warehouses (some 80,000 tons) that has gone unused through government mismanagement.
-Massive, soaring inflation (food prices are up 41% in the past year alone), which has been hitting hard the state-run supermarkets that Chavez has foisted upon his subjects (errrr, people).
-To replace the putrid, wasted food in the government warehouses and to supply the state-run supermarkets, Chavez's regime has resorted to sending in army troops to raid private wholesalers and to seize their food supplies.
-Chavez is also threatening to next take over the country's biggest private food processor, miller and brewer -- Polar company.
-Amidst all of these problems, he faces criticism of government incompetence from opponents, who allege that these various problems show "the state is a poor and corrupt administator" of a country's food supply (who could have ever imaged that?).

Now, I had been wondering why I hadn't recently seen too many Twitter blasts from ole Chavez (yes, I added him on Twitter just for laughs, although dude always tweets in Spanish and I have to try to translate the crap!). Now, it's clear why he's been more quiet -- he apparently has a lot more important things occupying his time than blasting out propaganda over the Net. But aren't all these calamities almost enough to make you feel a tiny bit sorry for Mr. Roly Poly Man (wink to Donovan Leitch)?

Well maybe not, but Chavez is not left without options down there. Methinks he might consider hitting up some of his Big Hollywood friends to float him a little (actually, a big) loan or donation to help prop up the Venezuelan food stores. After all, I'm almost certain that Danny Glover, Sean Penn and Oliver Stone would be more than willing to buck up for the cause. And if that proves ultimately inadequate, Vladimir Putin and Mahmoud Ahmadinejad are always just a phone call (or Tweet, as the case may be) away!

http://www.cnbc.com/id/37786852

I Read the News Today, Oh Boy: Some Fool Paid $1.2 Million for a John Lennon Lyric Sheet!


Actually, this auction item is very cool (pic on left): John Lennon’s handwritten lyrics for one of his most memorable songs, “A Day in the Life” (the final song from The Beatles’ masterpiece album, “Sgt. Pepper’s Lonely Hearts Club Band”; and Paul McCartney contributed the song’s middle eight as well). But $1.2 million? Even the folks at NYC’s Sotheby’s auction house must be shocked, since the pre-sale estimate of the lyric sheet’s value was $500,000 to $800,000.

Likely adding to the lyric sheet’s value, the sheet includes some of Lennon’s edits to the lyrics of the song. Those lyrics include the famous reference to a man who “blew his mind out in a car.” That lyric played a central role in the infamous Paul-McCartney-Is-Dead rumors (along with that ominous hand over Paul’s head on the Sgt. Pepper album cover -- see above). A perusal of this lyric sheet, however, seems to shed no new light on that particular lyric or on the question of whether or not Paul is, in fact, dead.

However, judging from Paul’s recent appearance (or was it an imposter?) at the White House and his rather first-grade-level Bush blasts, I’d say that while Paul does appear to still be alive, and while most of the lights do appear to still be on, I would question whether anyone’s been home for quite some time. But the old man is always good for a new silly love song, right?

http://www.kansascity.com/2010/06/19/2028746/john-lennon-lyrics-fetch-12m-at.html

Friday, June 18, 2010

Exile on Slimeball Street: "Wanted Man" John Edwards Goes Into Hiding, Tries to Avoid the Court System & The Rest of the World.


North Carolina attorney Hoppy Elliot is looking for John Edwards. "Let us know if you find him," says Elliot. "Because we've been looking for him all over the place." Such is the apparent life on the lam that Edwards has been living in recent weeks. Elliot represents former Edwards aide, Andrew Young, who claims to be in possession of a "tawdry sex tape" that catches Edwards and mistress Rielle Hunter (pictured above) in the act. Young has been sued by Hunter over the tape, and Elliot has been trying to serve Edwards with a subpoena that would compel Edwards to appear for a deposition in the case. But Edwards, who may or may not be holed up at his North Carolina estate, has been impossible to catch and impossible to reach by phone.

But some paltry deposition would seem to be the least of Edwards' current problems. Reportedly, also hovering over his head is the threat of a federal grand jury indictment concerning $1 million in presidential campaign funds that Edwards allegedly funneled to Rielle Hunter. Edwards' lawyers (apparently the only people in the civilized world who are able to communicate with him) have been working to try to avoid that indictment occurring.

So as you can see, Edwards certainly has plenty of motivation to make himself scarce these days. It's even being reported that Edwards in recent weeks has stopped his regular trips to local bars The Wooden Nickel and The Saratoga Grill, where Edwards likes to drink white wine (an aristocrat to the last) and hit on the ladies. Gosh, the price of being a wanted man!

Think back a mere three years, before the revelations came to light that Edwards fathered a child with Hunter (a former campaign worker) while Edwards' wife, Elizabeth, was suffering through the horror of breast cancer. Edwards -- a wildly rich and successful North Carolina personal injury attorney -- was to be the far left's "New Kennedy." Just a few years earlier, in 2004, the democrat party had even seen fit to offer us Edwards as the party's vice presidential candidate -- the person one heartbeat away from the presidency.

But then came 2007, with the National Enquirer chasing Edwards around a hotel and Edwards ducking into the $hithouse to try to avoid them. Makes me wonder, what $hithouse is Edwards hiding in now? And can someone let Hoppy Elliot know?

http://abcnews.go.com/Entertainment/Media/john-edwards-passes-lonely-existence-exile/story?id=10945633
http://www.nydailynews.com/news/2010/06/18/2010-06-18_hide_and_seek_former_senator_john_edwards_goes_underground_after_affair_scandal_.html

Say It Ain't So, Spaghetti O!


Today brings word of a massive recall of Campbell's Spaghetti O's. This, BTW, is one of my favorite foods. While Spaghetti O's really have no redeeming nutritional value, they are low fat, not to mention inexpensive, tasty and quick to prepare. But alas, they're only low fat if you consume the type without those disgusting little meatballs (Lord only knows what's in those things), otherwise known as "Original" flavor (see the pictured can).

And sure enough, today's recall only applies to Spaghetti O's containing meatballs. Even more specifically, if your can contains meatballs, has "EST 4K" stamped on it, and has a use-by date between June 2010 and December 2011, then it has been recalled. Reportedly, the recall resulted from fears that the meatballs in such cans may have been undercooked in Texas (I've heard of plenty 'a half-baked stuff comin' outta Texas, but this is ridiculous!).

As for the 8-10 cans of Spaghetti O's that I have in my pantry? Safe! Like I said, I don't eat the kind with meatballs. And please give me an ounce of credit over here for not using an obvious and mindless "Uh Oh Spaghetti O" headline for this blog post like every other article and blog today has been using (see, e.g., the link below).

Thursday, June 17, 2010

A Truly PATHETIC Display From Congressional Dems and Repubs Today.

Instead of focusing upon the God AWFUL oil spill situation hitting the gulf coast lands right now or ANY effort to actually try to minimize and clean up that disaster, we get congressional dems and repubs GRANDSTANDING and bullying around the BP CEO -- OH BIG MEN, YOU DEMS AND REPUBS! As if that BP fool is going to do anything other than what he did today, i.e. sit there and take it and try to avoid making admissions of legal liability.

PAY NO ATTENTION TO THIS BULLSHIT, folks: This is a dem effort to take attention away from OBAMA'S PATHETIC RESPONSE to this disaster, and a repub effort to do the politically correct thing by joining in the absurdity of beating up on BP rather than calling for a focus on the actual disaster that is unfolding before our very eyes on the gulf coasts. How about the shameful Florida GOPer asking this CEO Buffoon whether today is Thursday? Grandstanding of the highest order, accomplishing absolutely nothing, and completely ignoring the historical disaster that is still occurring down south.

Frankly, I haven't been THIS disgusted and angry since the dems ramrodded through the health care monstrosity against the will of the American people earlier this year. I love how these dems like to spin that the electorate really isn't that angry. Well, WE INDEPENDENTS SURE AS F*CK ARE. AND WE CONTINUE TO LOOK FORWARD TO KICKING EVERY DEM AND REPUB INCUMBENT TO THE CURB THAT WE POSSIBLY CAN COME NOVEMBER. Stick that in your pathetic partisan pipe and smoke it! WE CONTROL YOUR ELECTION OUTCOMES AND WE AIN'T GOING AWAY!

http://www.washingtonpost.com/wp-dyn/content/article/2010/06/17/AR2010061705855.html?hpid=topnews

Take Another Toke! Is Sarah Palin Set To Be Cheech & Chong's New Favorite Pol?


Palin proclaimed this week that American law enforcement "should not focus its energy on the 'minimal problem' of marijuana." However, she stopped short of calling for the outright legalization of weed. (Politico.com's story linked at bottom).

C'mon! Talk about walkin' the fence over there! Either you support pot's legalization (which I don't) or else you don't go around suggesting that law enforcement should just turn a blind eye towards it. Simple as that. (And idiots on the right and left sometimes accuse me of being mealy-mouthed!? That's choice.) Nice rack, BTW. That new?

http://www.politico.com/news/stories/0610/38660.html

Bigfoot?! Not Again!

Trending atop today's national news, we've got a so-called "Sasquatch expert" in Virginia claiming that he's on the verge of discovering a Bigfoot, and we've got new Bigfoot sightings in neighboring North Carolina (see the two links at bottom). Didn't we get enough of this on April 1!? (See: http://independentrage.blogspot.com/2010/04/shock-carcass-of-bigfoot-similar.html). And BTW, isn't calling oneself a "Sasquatch expert" rather akin to me calling myself a vampire expert or an expert on virtuous, honest politicians?

But regardless. In actuality, Bigfoot is one of the most unique creatures in the annals of world history in that (1) he does not exist but (2) yet never seems to completely die out. Dude's always making a comeback! He was Evander Holyfield before Real Deal was cool. And forget Al Gore -- here's the real Inconvenient Truth: Bigfoot will not be discovered because there is no such thing! But it can be fun to make believe sometimes, right? And so it is that Bigfoot today sits near the top of Yahoo!'s list of hottest trending news topics.

Wednesday, June 16, 2010

Episode 2 Tonight of "You're Cut Off" on VH1! The Spoiled Brats Are Forced to Clean the House of Omarosa!

(If case you're not familiar with this hot new reality series, try this primer from Episode 1: http://independentrage.blogspot.com/2010/06/episode-1-tonight-of-hot-new-vh1.html).

(And read more specifically about the participating Nine Ladies at this link: http://www.vh1.com/shows/youre_cut_off/cast.jhtml)

Nutshell synopsis of Episode 2: As the ladies are forced to perform household chores around their own house as well as at the house of The Apprentice's "Celebrity Super Diva," Omarosa, it starts to become clear whom the real bad girls are in this spoiled rotten group. And even among the bad girl faction, an "Old Money versus New Money" rift emerges!

Segment 1: At end of Episode 1, Bad Attitude Gia was beatin' the hell out of Jacqueline with a pillow. The next morning, Jaqueline has a headache and says that Gia also called her a "fat slut" the previous night. "I hate Gia," says Jaqueline. Then group moderator Laura Baron enters the house to have a meeting with the nine ladies. She tells them that any further violent acts such as The Pillow Incident will not be tolerated and will result in someone being sent home (and still cut off). Laura tells the ladies that this week's theme is "Respect," and she informs them that they will have to perform a variety of household chores. The ladies will receive $200 a week (for the entire group) if they complete all chores, but will lose $25 for each chore not performed. The completely gorgeous yet breezy Erica chimes in that she does not know how to make a bed and has never, tried as she might, been able to figure it out. Meantime Gia foreshadows later events by saying that will not clean up after anyone. Busty blonde and southern belle Amber remarks that she has never done laundry in her entire life. Needless to say, these ladies are not too happy about the prospect of having to do housework.

Laura then brings in Sylvia, whom Laura says is a professional cleaning lady who will help the ladies with their chores. Erica says that she would prefer to have her own maids -- Maria and Carmen -- around here instead of Sylvia. Then sassy Chrissy from LA asks Sylvia to help Chrissy with turning on the vacuum cleaner. Chrissy then has Sylvia vacuum the room, with Chrissy slinking off to the comfort of a couch, where she puts up her feet. In contrast, Amber and Pam are actually working in the kitchen on getting it cleaned up.

Next up, Erica's bigoted streak, which reared its ugly head in Episode 1, once again exhibits itself. Even though Sylvia has been speaking English to the ladies, Erica -- apparently thinking that all cleaning ladies primarily speak Spanish -- starts talking to Sylvia in Spanish ("Yo hablo espanol," spouts Erica). Erica then remarks, "Of course I know Spanish -- how else would I communicate with my maids?" Erica then pulls a Chrissy and has Sylvia mow the yard and perform all of the yardwork that Erica is supposed to be doing.

Then all of the ladies are driven to a mansion. Surprise Time: Laura reveals to the ladies that Sylvia is not really a maid at all, but instead is an entrepreneur who owns her own housecleaning company that services the rich and famous of Hollywood. Now the ladies will be working for Sylvia.

Segment 2: Still at the mansion, the ladies are informed that they will now have to clean it, as employees of Sylvia, and that there was just a huge party there the prior evening (so have fun cleanin')! They are asked to put on a modern maid outfit (cotton collar shirt, loose khacki pants and tennis shoes -- an outfit despised by all). Gia is still being problematic, refusing to put on the uniform and again saying that she won't do housework ("I'm a princess! -- my hands were just made to have diamonds on them and to look pretty"). Erica resolves that since Gia refuses to clean, then Erica won't either.

But freaky hot blonde Leanne and Italian firebrand Jessica are working. They get living room detail, and are quickly repulsed to find vomit there that they must clean up. Worse yet: Amber, Jaqueline and leggy North Carolina beauty queen Courtnee are assigned to clean the bathoom, which they quickly find to be strewn with hair weave all over the floor and with a nasty toilet containing Lord Knows What (appears to be hair weave, puke and $hit, truth be told). Chrissy and Pam drew kitchen assignment. Pam gets to work, but Chrissy pulls a repeat of her earlier performance, sitting her ass down on a chair and putting her feet up. Sylvia tells Chrissy that she's making Sylvia look bad, and Chrissy storms out in a huff.

Then Surprise # 2: Down the mansion's staircase struts none other than Omarosa. This is her mansion! Jessica gets a load of Omarosa, is clearly intimidated, and proclaims that she now wants to back out of this job because she's scared to death. Omarosa complains that she's been forced to come downstairs due to all the noise and ruckus ("what ruckus, can you describe the ruckus, sir?") being stirred up by the "cleaning" ladies. Omarosa quickly takes notice that Jessica wants to find a scraper to take some wax off of a table. Omarosa grabs Sylvia: "You aren't thinking about scraping my European marble table, are you?" Sylvia quickly puts the kibosh on Jessica's efforts, but not before taking a healthy dose of Jessica's verbal abuse and back-talk. "When did the help start talking to you like that?," asks Omarosa. Omarosa then heads back upstairs.

Gia and Erica have scurried off to a bedroom to hang out since they've both resolved to do absolutely no housework in the mansion. These two very high-strung divas, who would typically be at each other's throats, are actually getting along at the moment as they are united in their common purpose of performing no work. (As an interlude, it's revealed that Amber, Jaqueline and Courtnee have done a nice job cleaning the bathroom. Jacqueline, despite saying that she has "never cleaned before in my life," actually scrubbed and cleaned up that nasty toilet.)

Then Gia and Erica head outside to sit beside Omarosa's pool and hot tub. Omarosa sees them through a window and gives them a very dirty look. Gia takes offense, saying that she "will slap that attitude out of her face -- I don't care who the hell you think you are, nobody gives Gia the stink eye" (nice reference to herself in the third person, BTW!). Gia (with Erica in tow) then marches up to Omarosa's bedroom to confront her. Omarosa immediately gets all in Gia's face, and Gia tells her that "if you're gonna get that much in my face, you need to stick some gum in your mouth." Still though, Gia seems a bit flustered in Omarosa's presence, and Omarosa's very strong personality seems to win out in this verbal altercation. Omarosa tells Gia that she's "on very thin ice" as we head to commercial.

Segment 3: Following the "thin ice" comment, Gia moves away down the hall with a worried look on her face. Omarosa, obviously irrate, heads back into her bedroom. Erica off-camera states the obvious: "Even though Gia thinks she's really tough, she is no match for Omarosa." Then all the ladies are gathered to receive a performance review from Sylvia: A "good" review goes to Pam, Leanne, Jaqueline, Courtnee, Jessica and Amber. Receiving a negative review, of course, are the three emerging truly bad girls of this motley crew of spoiled rotten brats -- Erica, Gia and Chrissy. It's revealed that as a reward, the six ladies who received a positive performance review will tomorrow get a massage at a popular LA day spa.

Back at the ladies' modest living quarters, a note from Laura Baron reveals that since the ladies have been assigned double the typical amount of chores this week, their full take is $400 but that after deductions for the three ladies who refused to work, they still only get $200! (BTW, is this a Full Metal Jacket-like motivational ploy, i.e. penalize the performing people for the poor performance of the three bad ones until the good folks are ultimately driven to beat the hell out of Erica, Gia and Chrissy in the middle of the night with soap bars tucked into socks? Stay tuned...). OK, I digress. Laura's note also asks for four volunteers to go grocery shopping that night for the group (they will be limited by their $200 budget). Four of the not-so-bad ladies -- Courtnee, Jaqueline (now being referred to as "Jackie"), Amber and Pam -- volunteer to go.

The grocery shopping trip gets off to a rocky start when the ladies seem disoriented once inside the grocery store, not really knowing (likely never having been in a grocery store before) where to go or what to do. But alas, they catch on and start tossing anything and everything in their cart (apparently forgetting their $200 budget). Girl-next-door-in-looks-only Pam personally offends me as they march down the liquor aisle, remarking: "I Don't Like Beer!" But she redeems herself when she and Jackie actually pick out some dog treats for Gia to consume back at the house ("What flavor does she like?," posits Pam). Meantime, two of the southern ladies -- Amber and Courtnee -- are visibly shaken and scared at the sight of packaged chicken breast ("I'm scared of salmonella," cries Courtnee). Amber also finds balonie "disgusting," and outright starts shrieking when the group spots some pickled pigs feet in one aisle!

That was the last straw for the ladies, as they make a quick beeline for the check-out counter. There, they encounter even more bad news, and they've run up a tab that's $80 over budget. Jackie takes command, telling the others that they need to "prioritize" ("I never thought I'd use that word in my life," notes Jackie) and select the items they need the least so that those can be given back in order to reduce the bill. Once they get the tab down to $199.74, they have met their budget and are ready for someone to sack up their groceries. There being no bagger at their line at that moment, Jackie gets on the store's loud speaker and puts out the call: "We need a professional bagger." For good measure, Amber gets on speaker and shouts at a passing customer, "Sir, would you like to bag our groceries?" It's now shown who actually bagged the groceries, but the ladies are next shown driving back home, all complaining about how tired they are from their rather exhaustive grocery trip.

Then we get some mini-fireworks between a couple of the bad girls, Erica and Chrissy. Apparently Chrissy heard a mosquito in their bedroom and turned on the lights to try to find it. Erica, who was already sleeping, can't believe that the lights have been turned on (BTW, the sight of the ultra-aristocratic Erica sleeping on the top bunk of a bunk bed is truly a wonderful sight to behold! Not to mention that she's flat-out gorgeous doing so). These two ultra-divas then engage in a bona fide First Grade-style game of "Yes I am, No You're Not," as Erica repeatedly turns off the lights, only for Chrissy to turn them back on just out of spite. For all we know, this mindless exercise may have gone on for several hours!

Segment 4: Bad girls Erica and Chrissy are both still pissed from the night before. The light flickering incident kept Erica from getting her "beauty rest" and she & Chrissy squabble about closet space. Chrissy tells Erica that she "doesn't exist to me anymore," but yet Chrissy continues to engage Erica in derogatory conversation: "You got nice big boobs, but they hang low." Erica blasts back, "You need botox -- There's no excuse for your cellulite." Leanne meanwhile is tired of all the incessant Erica-Chrissy-Gia bickering and is excited for the other ladies' opportunity to get out of the house and to the day spa. But much to the ladies' chagrin, the day spa is not located in the ritziest of neighborhoods, and the ladies are horrified by the sight of some homeless men on the side of the street and -- get this -- some barbed wire on the top of one property's fence! (Oh, The Humanity!). Says Jackie: "We are, like, in a REALLY bad area. I'm scared for my life!"

The ladies then arrive at LA's Sunset Foot Spa, a joint which purports to practice "Ancient Chinese Foot Reflexology" and which serves many Hollywood A-Listers. The ladies are bit appalled by the neighborhood and by their first glance inside the day spa, but they lighten up when a note from Laura informs them of some of the very high-end celeb clientele that this joint brings in.

Back at the house, bad girls Erica, Gia and Chrissy are stuck home alone. Here it starts to become apparent that there is a clear rift in this faction between (1) "Old Money" Aristocrat Erica and (2) "New Money" Ultra-Divas Gia and Chrissy. It starts with Gia jokingly telling Chrissy (in Erica's presence) to be nice to Erica so that Erica will make them coffee. The three of them start bickering. Erica remarks that she "was born with a silver spoon in my mouth" and, off-camera, says that "there's definitely a difference between old money and new money -- Chrissy and Gia are new money, and that's why they're so trashy."

Now back to the day spa, where the six not-so-bad ladies share a champagne toast in celebration of being away from the house (and in a comment clearly aimed at the three bad girls and at the not-so-appreciated digs back at the house, the not-so-good Jessica remarks, "This toast is to hard working in a filthy, disgusting house!"). The ladies clearly enjoy their sessions with the Chinese masseurs, with Jackie taking a real liking to Peter "Master P", the zany Chinese masseur.

Back at the house, things get uglier between the three bad ladies, as the Old Money versus New Money Rift grows wider. Gia starts bringing up personal things about Erica, such as her confession in Episode 1 about some the really rotten things her old man tells her about her appearance. To add insult to injury, Gia tells Erica that she's an "ugly, stupid, whore" (BTW, who's Gia calling ugly!). Erica -- seemingly unable to get away from the bigotry as she sports a "JAP and Proud" T-Shirt -- largely takes the high road and lets Gia run her trap.

As the not-so-bad ladies leave the day spa, Amber says that "today I learned that you can spend less and get more -- it's not all about how much you pay for something." All of them then go back to the house, and Leanne starts a huge "popcorn fight" in the dining room, with Jackie and Erica participating (Erica sticking a glob of popcorn right down Leanne's bra is a special highlight). Afterward, Leanne and Jackie (and even Erica a little bit) realize they need to clean up the mess, which results in Leanne trying to run a vacuum on the top of the dining room table's tablecloth (which gets sucked up into the vacuum).

Then enters Jessica, who criticizes their trashing of the dining room as well as their cleanup efforts (don't set Jessica's ass loose on Obama & BP anytime soon, methinks). Suddenly, two of the not-so-bad girls -- Leanne and Jessica -- are ALL OVER each other's asses. As Jessica starts to exit, Erica chimes in to Jessica, "Take your tampon out your [rest inaudible]...." Jessica, hearing this blast, storms in and is IRRATE!

Next the end-of-the-episode Group Session between Laura Baron & The Ladies begins. Jessica immediately complains about the Popcorn Fight, but Leanne defends it as her attempt to finally have an ounce of fun in this high-strung house, and Leanne also notes that she and others were starting the cleanup process when Jessica bursted in and started ranting and raving. Jessica then launches into another screaming tirade (revealing herself, in my mind, as the solid middle ground between the three Bad Girls and the other Not-So-Bad Girls, since she exhibits a lot of traits of both sides).

Segment 5: Laura has to exert all efforts to calm Jessica the hell down, and then reveals that "Respect" was this week's theme and lesson. That's why she had the ladies work with Sylvia in 2 different settings. Sylvia's Performance Reviews are shared with the ladies: Sylvia says that Jackie, Courtnee & Amber did an excellent job with their work and were very sweet, nice and respectful. Jackie is very choked up by these compliments, and one really sees that this whole insane process is actually helping Jackie to grow, as Jackie talks about having a whole new appreciation for her own housekeepers and they work they do (by virtue of having done some of that same work -- recall that Jackie is the one who cleaned out that nasty toilet). Real sweetheart Courtnee echoes those sentiments.

Next Sylvia talks about the bad girls, first noting that Chrissy just didn't seem to care, doing no work to help out the group. Proof positive that any human being can try to spin just about any situation in any way possible, lazy-ass-refusing-to-work Chrissy then characterizes Sylvia's very valid criticisms as "over the top" and "disrespectful." LOL. Pam is then commended for working in her area even despite Chrissy's refusal to work, and next Laura blasts on Chrissy, saying that she was so disrespectful to Sylvia.

Sylvia had even worse things to say about Gia and Erica, whom she describes as having "no morals and no respect" (very accurate, but they sure are hot!, for better or for worse). To her credit, Erica expresses remorse for letting Sylvia down and states that she hopes that Sylvia will accept an apology from her. Gia, in contrast, is in no apologizing mood! But then Omarosa's impressions of Gia (recall their earlier spat) are played on video for all the ladies to see: "Gia's just a little angry troll, and it's sad because she could actually use that kind of skill for leadership, but instead she uses it to kind of manipulate -- clearly I was underwhelmed by Gia, underwhelmed." GIANT OUCH! Gia then complains, weakly, that Omarosa has no reason judging her from only having know her a very short time that evening (well perhaps the couple minutes you spent trying to get in her face outside her bedroom in her house pretty much shored up her opinions fairly quickly, there, Gia!).

Segment 6 (Final Segment, Thank God!): OK, Bottom Line Time: Who Passed and Who Failed? (Passing means that a Lady is positively progressing through the program and is one step closer to having her "benefactor" take her back and restore her cash flow; while Failing means that the Lady better shape up because she is on her way to a recommendation that the benefactor not take her back with a reinstalled cash flow). The now-emerging trichotomy between these ladies is all the more clear from these Pass/Fail Grades: Amber, Courtnee, Jackie, Pam and Leanne all PASS. The three bad girls -- Chrissy, Erica and Gia -- all FAIL, obviously. Meantime, the middle ground lady, Jessica, is forced to sweat it out to the end, when it's revealed that she PASSED because she worked hard, even despite her often bad attitude and very angry, outspoken nature.

Final Surprise: A New Weekly Award has been created for the VIP ("Very Improved Princess"), meaning the best-performing Lady of that week. The VIP entitles the lady to a large personal room and bathroom of her own at the house (previously, such suite was masked behind a locked door that the ladies could not access). But it also carries the responsibility that week of doling out all the chore assignments and complete responsibility for the weekly budget being maintained. The First VIP Award Recipient?: Jackie! And frankly, it's hard to dispute that award since she's the one who primarily cleaned that raunchy-ass toilet. She was also given credit for overcoming her altercation with Gia last week and largely avoiding Gia this week.

But look out for dissension in the ranks from none other than the "middle ground" angry babe, Jessica: Jess is the one lady who is actually visibly angry with the choice of Jackie as this week's VIP, commenting: "Ugly little bitch who had botched plastic surgery -- you get a VIP bedroom! That was like a BOOM to my heart . Jackie had a popcorn fight in the freakin' dining room 15 minutes ago and was acting' like a freakin' banshee. Are you kidding me? I'm so pissed off!" End of Episode.

Preview of upcoming episodes: The ladies are exposed to the horror of being forced to go shopping at a discount clothing store! Plus Erica (who else?) continues to rub everyone in every wrong possible way!

Final thoughts: In tonight's episode, the general dichotomy of these ladies is really starting to become clear. Erica is probably the most purely hot gal of this whole bunch, but she's completely superficial, bigoted, aristocratic and out-of-touch. Gia and Chrissy are, in a word, pathetic, and they inhabit the trifecta of "bad girls" with Erica, although there is a definite "Old Money versus New Money" rift between the three of them. Inhabiting the "not-so-bad" girls faction on the other side is Amber, Courtnee, Jackie, Leanne and Pam. In the middle of those two extremes is Jessica, who can work hard and be nice or just the same try to bite your head off in the drop of a hat.

My early personal favorite from this whole show: Erica is the hottest, but Courtnee is the one whom a dude would most like to meet in real life. Courtnee has had very little air time so far on the series, and you know why? Because she's the least prone to stay stupid, over-the-top things (a very bad trait if one wants to be a reality star, but a very admirable trait in almost every other circle of life). She just goes about her business as the very tall, leggy, gorgeous supermodel type from North Carolina. She's the Independent Rage's Favorite! (OK, so are we finally done? Good Grief! It's 1:15 over HERE!).

Tuesday, June 15, 2010

SHOCK: Al Gore Reportedly Had a Two-Year Extramarital Affair with Larry David's Ex-Wife! Curb Your Enthusiasm, There, Oh Inventor of The Internet!

Star Magazine is reporting today (link at bottom) what must be a most Inconvenient Truth for Al Gore -- reporting that for the past two years, he's has had an affair with Larry David's ex-wife, Laurie David (pictured above with Larry and Al & Tipper Gore). Larry David, of course, is the filthy rich co-creator of Seinfeld and star of the HBO hit comedy Curb Your Enthusiasm. The Davids, by the way, divorced in 2007 "amidst reports" that she was cheating then with the caretaker of their Martha's Vineyard summer home (Laurie likes her Lovers, apparently!).

The "shock" here to me is the person with whom Al was allegedly cheating, and not so much the fact that he was having an affair (allegedly), which frankly comes as no surprise. As I stated in this space upon the recent news of Al and Tipper's separation, there would be more to this story since (as the wise, though deranged, right-winger Michael Savage stated that day) people only get separated or divorced for one of two reasons: (1) An affair; and/or (2) Money. (See the "Inconvenient Marriage" item in the Ladies Panel, right sidebar).

One final thought: I seem to recall Al and Tipper claiming, at the time their separation was announced, that there was no cheating and no affair involved in the separation. Thus, if the Star report is true, then Al and Tipper basically tried to pull their best Bill Clinton impersonation, i.e. looking the American people straight in the eye and outright lying to them. Not that I'd expect much better or any different from the likes of Al & Tipper Gore, truth be told. But if Al would lie about something like this, just how much credit are you going to give him for believing a single word that came out of his mouth in An Inconvenient Truth? If this story is true, what little credibility the man might have had left is now completely shot in my opinion (not because of the affair itself, but because of the bald faced lie he tried to tell us -- allegedly).

Monday, June 14, 2010

Happy Flag Day! And Don't You Dare Blow Your Nose In It Lest You Want a Good Beatin'!



On Flag Day 102 years ago (June 14, 1908), President Teddy Roosevelt was outside of Philly trying to get his grub on. As Roosevelt glanced up from his eats, he spied a man who looked to be blowing his nose with a miniature American flag. Roosevelt immediately picked up a "wooden rod" from the ground (it's always handy to have a few good wooden rods lying around for just such an occasion) and proceeded to use it to whip the other man.

After numerous strong "whacks" to the other man's person, Roosevelt realized that what he had thought to be a small flag was actually just a blue handkerchief with white stars. Roosevelt apologized to the other man, but then -- just for good measure -- gave the man one extra whack for having gotten Roosevelt all "riled up with national pride." True story (apparently). Link below.

Sunday, June 13, 2010

So, Will The Little Fella Next Need to Wipe Saudi Arabia From the Face of the Map, Too?

It's clear that Saudi Arabia has given Israel permission to cross Saudi air space as a part of an Israeli air strike on Iranian nuclear facilities (linked story at bottom). While the giving of such permission would seem highly counterintuitive on its face, it actually makes perfect sense, since I can't believe that too many of the middle eastern Arab nations really want to see a Persian nation controlled by crazy men to be nuclear armed. As the linked story states: "Despite the tension between the two governments [of Saudi Arabia & Israel], they share a mutual loathing of the regime in Tehran and a common fear of Iran’s nuclear ambitions."

All of this begs the question: Will The Little Fella, Mahmoud Ahmadinejad, now feel compelled to express Iran's desire to "wipe" Saudi Arabia "from the face of the map," as he has previously threatened with respect to Israel? Will it also become necessary for Iran to wipe the entire Arab world off the face of the map? And will it eventually become necessary for Iran also to wipe most of the world off the face of the map (except, of course, for those friendly to Iran, such as Russia, Turkey (an actual NATO member), and Venezuela)?

I think history has shown that when one country starts with the ambition of needing to wipe one nationality of people from the face of the earth, such ambition and perceived necessity will typically lead to horrific reaches well beyond that of even the originally stated sinister goal. Just as counter-measures largely grounded in appeasement principles have never worked historically in those instances, so too are they doomed to failure when it comes to Iran. Not that anyone in Washington listens to any of us stupid people living in Middle America, of course.

http://www.timesonline.co.uk/tol/news/world/middle_east/article7148555.ece

Saturday, June 12, 2010

Sarah "Boob-Gate": Real Or Not? Palin Speaks Out This Weekend.


Pictures like the one above from a recent appearance by Palin at the Belmont Stakes have the blogosphere all abuzz this week as to whether she may have had a little silicon augmentation recently (compare the above picture with the older picture on the left). New this weekend, Palin actually addressed the issue with Greta Van Susteren on Fox News. Although Palin stopped short of uttering the famous Seinfeld line, "They're Real and They're Spectacular," she did offer a straightforward denial, saying: "No, I have not had implants." (Links below).

First of all, if Palin did have a boob job, who cares? Good for her. Although if she did, she does herself no good by lying about it. As to what the truth is here, there does seems to be quite the contrast between the older and newer pictures (perhaps the person in the first photo is a fake Palin like the one from the Nailin' Palin video?). That said, different T-shirts can certainly make a lady's mammalian protuberances look very different size-wise from one shirt to the next. So I'm not passing any judgment. I'll leave it to you to decide.

http://www.huffingtonpost.com/2010/06/12/sarah-palins-boob-gate-re_n_610136.html
http://popwatch.ew.com/2010/06/12/sarah-palins-boobs-are-real-get-over-it/
http://www.gather.com/viewArticle.action?articleId=281474978289538

Friday, June 11, 2010

"Overkill Is Underrated"


Couldn't have said it better myself. That's a line spouted by Liam Neeson's "Hannibal" character (pictured on left) in the new A-Team motion picture, which was released today and which updates the famous '80s television series (about time -- you have to love it when a plan finally comes together). The film has garnered a PG-13 rating, apparently due in part to Hannibal's cigar smoking.

The reviews have looked to be mostly positive (a few are linked below), describing the film as pure, unadulterated fun and a lot of funny lines. After all, if you ever happened to watch the original series (which I love), what else would you expect except for fun, fun, and more fun? Look for cameos from two of the three living original series stars -- Dirk Benedict and Dwight Schultz (unfortunately, Mr. T turned down a cameo role).

I might even have to endure the teen masses this weekend to go see this one. Or maybe I'm just on the jazz again.

Thursday, June 10, 2010

Wow! Dems Actually Crafting a Message Designed to Appeal to Mainstream American Opinion?! That's a First in a Long Time.

Today's Politico.com contains a rather startling story (linked at bottom) that reports that democrat party operatives are crafting a immigration reform message that will be pushed by dems, although likely not until 2011. The message, which would be utilized as a part of trying to pass comprehensive immigration reform in Congress, would consist of an "enforcement-first, law-and-order, limited compassion pitch" that would eschew a focus on providing a "path to citizenship" in favor of focusing on "getting right with the law" -- meaning "obey our laws, learn our language and pay our taxes." Heck, the message would even drop the use of the silly liberal phrase, "undocumented workers."

First of all, when dems on a widespread basis actually start spouting this type of message, then I'll believe it. I find it very hard to believe that the far left-wingers who control the dem party would ever stand still for such a message. But, at least in theory, I like what I'm hearing and may indeed be very interested if the message is coupled with the necessary dual focus upon securing the border. If dems are actually smart enough to push such dually-focused legislation in the next few years, they will have the support of most Independents, and all of the obligatory "amnesty" blasts in the world from the far right won't be able to stop the legislation. But like I said: I'll believe it when I see it.

Wednesday, June 9, 2010

Episode 1 Tonight of the Hot New VH1 Reality Series, "You're Cut Off"!!! This Show's VERY Entertaining & Extremely Over The Top!!!


Premise of the show: Nine gorgeous young ladies (who also happen to be spoiled brats) are lured into appearing on a show that they think will feature them bragging up and living their normal lifestyles in the lap of luxury. Little do they know, however, that they have been cut off by their families of all their cash and conveniences. The nine ladies must live together in a rather modest house and learn to get along without all of their accustomed luxuries. Moderating (for lack of a better term) this highly combustible situation is professional lifestyle and relationship strategist, Laura Baron.

Nutshell synopsis of Episode 1: The ladies get introduced to this situation and do not react well! Erica and Gia emerge as the two most over-the-top personalities amongst the ladies (and real competitors to be "Queen Bee" of this rotten hive), but Gia and Jaqueline also emerge as the two most emotionally despondent gals in this group by the end of the episode (almost coming to fisticuffs). Before launching into the episode, I think it's necessary to give a quick description of the 9 ladies:

-Amber: A busty blonde and traditional southern belle from Savannah, GA.
-Chrissy: A very sassy African-American hottie from LA.
-Courtnee: A gorgeous African-American beauty queen from Charlotte, NC.
-Erica: A remarkably beautiful, well-endowed blonde (looks a lot like Heidi Montag before all the plastic surgeries) prone to extremely arrogant, self-centered behavior (which I found hilarious), although also with an apparent streak of just a little ignorant bigotry (she's Jewish, herself).
-Gia: A very well put-together hot lady from Cali (who says she's of Middle Eastern ancestry), and the only married mom on this show (who also says she never changes diapers, feeds her daughter at night, or cleans up dog poop), and with some apparent emotional issues, but also quite the "alpha" female.
-Jaqueline: A hard-to-read brunette from Jersey, very close to her family, very emotional, and very much not likin' this situation!
-Jessica: A feisty Italian-ancestry firebrand from Jersey who reminds me in appearance of Amy Winehouse (I find Amy, though not her lifestyle, very hot, BTW).
-Leanne: Another well-endowed blonde from Cali, with a cool, European-accented daddy.
-Pamela ("Pam"): A brown-haired lady who looks like the cute "girl next door," except that she's anything but; how she makes her money is completely shrouded in mystery.

Segment 1: Before it's revealed to the 9 ladies, the show reveals to us that this is an 8-week program, in which the ladies must cook, clean, budget and work a job. If they "graduate," they then have to convince their families to "take them back" (in the sense of restoring their cash flow). The show starts at LA's Beverly Center, a very high-end clothing and jewelry outfit, with the ladies thinkin' they are there to live it up as stars of "The Good Life," a new (and fake) show about the lifestyles of rich divas. But one problem: When the ladies go to check out (running up tabs in the several thousands of dollars), none of their credit cards work! They all then storm off in a huff to the customer service desk, arriving there all at once and shouting in unison at the sales associate there. He tells them to head through that door over there, where all will be explained.

In the room behind the door, the ladies meet Laura Baron, who shows the ladies videos of their family members telling them that they are "cut off." Some of the ladies become very emotional at the news, as if they just lost their best friend (and perhaps maybe they did), including Jacqueline, Jessica and Gia. Others handle the news much better and much more matter-of-fact, such as Chrissy, Amber, Pam, Leanne and Courtnee. In the meantime, Erica has trouble even concentrating on the substance of the message that she's being told by her mom, commenting: "I was wondering, what is she wearing?!"

Segment 2: After the family videos are over, Laura Baron tells the ladies, "Consider this Princess rehab!" The ladies are not appreciative of that remark and do not like Laura. They are defiant (and in denial), all echoing the sentiment that "They Can't Cut Me Off!" Laura confides that the mission of this show is to "turn these entitled princesses into strong Independent women" (and since this blog is The Independent Rage, I can really appreciate that!). The ladies are then ushered out to mini-vans, which they find very offensive ("no limo!?"). Worst yet, the seats in the vans aren't even leather, as Jacqueline notes.

The vans drive through a well-kept, yet distinctly middle class suburban LA neighborhood, which the ladies actually believe to be "the ghetto" (as is obvious, these ladies sure have a lot to learn!). They pull into the driveway of where they will be staying. It's a modest ranch-style house, with admittedly outdated '70s or '80s style outside decor (but very well maintained). The ladies are outraged by the digs, with Erica commenting that "my housekeeper doesn't even live in a house like this."

Then we get a big pan shot of all the ladies' luggage: Literally dozens upon dozens of huge suitcases all piled up in the driveway. The ladies are then informed that from among their huge mass of luggage, they will only be allowed to take one large canvas bag full of stuff into the house (with hair products and diamonds not excluded from the requirement). Then It's Rat Race Time!: The ladies are then told that it's first come, first served as to the choice of beds in the house, and so they will have to quickly pick out their bag of stuff to take in if they want to have an early pick of the litter in terms of the beds (this angle was a pure stroke of genius by the show producers, BTW). Needless to say, the ladies become completely FRANTIC, scurrying to pick out which items of clothing, jewelry, etc., that they will take in, all the time realizing that they really needed to hurry! Interestingly, only Erica departs from this behavior, saying that she will take her time in picking out what to bring in (she says that she's going to make sure that all of her outfits are very well "coordinated" -- really though, you just can't make this stuff up, folks).

The ladies are appalled by the interior of the house (which is very modest and admittedly very outmoded style-wise). Courtnee crows, "Back home, my closet is bigger than this whole house!" (which was perhaps the funniest line of the entire episode, harkening back to the Days when The Nature Boy Ric Flair ruled the world -- one of Natch's famous lines was, (taking off one of his shoes and pointing to a fan): "See this Shoe?! This Shoe costs more than your house, Pal!!!" But I digress.

Anyway, in the bedrooms of the house, Jessica remarks, "SINGLE BEDS! -- I can't believe this!" Even more funny is the bunk-bed set up of each bedroom! And they have to SHARE a mere TWO bathrooms between the nine of them! Then they realize they will have to cook their own meals, and they lament that there are only frozen foods and eggs in their fridge! The segment closes with it being almost nightfall, and with all the ladies inside the house save one -- Erica, who's still out there picking out what to take inside (although, she did resolve to follow this very strategy).

Segment 3: Jessica takes the lead on trying to scare up some grub for dinner. She's taken aback by the ground beef she finds in the fridge that comes in a wrapped roll. Then Erica puts on a very hot French Maid costume and starts traipsing around in it (Erica IS very hot, despite anything else you might want to say about her). Jessica comments that Erica "has nothing between her ears." Gia hangs out in another room, not helping with the meal. She likes to drag upon her hookah, which she does here, and comments that "a diva needs soft hands," and therefore she can't be helping with any cooking or cleaning.

Dinner Time! But the Eats don't turn out so well: As best as I could discern, it looks like the ladies serve up to each other (1) some burnt meatballs, (2) some badly dried up noodles, (3) a very greasy looking salad (how do you get grease into a salad, BTW?), and (4) a dish that my grandma used to call "hamburger crumbles," much to my chagrin (i.e. ground hamburger with some mild seasoning on top). Blah! Yuck! Methinks these ladies need to spend just a few hours of their lives, for once, in a kitchen! (Hey, I'm bad in the kitchen, but could have done a whole lot better than THAT!). As the ladies sit there on the edge of vomiting over this pathetic food, they agree that they are suddenly living "lower middle class" (and again -- not even close!).

After Din-Din, this cheap "box wine" that the ladies have been drinking (the only alcohol in the house) starts to kick in, and business really starts to pick up! Erica knows a trick where she can take the bottom circle of a large wine class and fit it entirely within her mouth (quite impressive)! Then Erica trots out the jewelry box that she so meticulously picked out and brought into the house, allowing the ladies to sample it ("Because if I were them, I'd want to be like me too!"; "I love myself" -- truly endearing, hilarous stuff!). The Big E (as I'm now calling her) Show continues from there, with E quickly shedding the maid outfit and running buck naked in a big circle around the house. BUT Gia is not amused: "I get the sense that Erica wants to be Queen Bee of the house, and that's not gonna happen because there is only one Queen Bee, and that be me!"

Erica quickly gets wind of a bad vibe from Gia and confronts her. Erica comments that they are very different people, noting that she (Erica) is Jewish, and guessing that Gia (who looks and is Middle Eastern) is "Muslim". Gia confronts Erica (and rightfully so) on assuming that she's any particular religion simply based on the way she looks (as I assume Erica would not like some person telling her, "you look pretty Jewish there, Erica"). Gia comments that she could "slap" Erica's "ass," but that she'll refrain. Erica comments, "Gia's such an angry person and I think she could really use a nose job."

Segment 4: The ladies have a group session with Laura Baron: First, Jacqueline reveals why she become so emotional earlier -- it sounds like she feels very close to her parents and thus felt a bit jilted when they completely cut her off out of the blue. And then, frankly, probably the truly saddest moment of the episode occurred (and I'm being serious for once), when Erica revealed that in the past year, when she was about 30 pounds heavier, her old man -- a wealthy and prominent plastic surgeon -- teased her about her weight, making liposuction noises to her and pinching her. This from a dude who accused her earlier in the episode of being "addicted to plastic surgery." As an aside, this rotten old man has quickly shot up my chart for the annual award of Most Pathetic Human Father Alive 2010. (We'll see if he remains at #1). Regardless, I think we can now see the precise source of where some of Erica's issues have emanated.

Segment 5: Girl-next-door (in looks only) Pam claims to be the only "independent" lady amongst these nine divas, saying that she lives in her own apartment and pays her own bills with her own income. Pressed by Laura Baron and others to reveal how she supports herself, Pam resorts to the ridiculous claim that she's an investment banker on Wall Street (again, you just can't make this stuff up) -- a story which even this group is not buying! Jessica comes right out with it: "Are YOU a Prostitute!?" Pam denies that harsh indictment, but remains mysterious on the source of her income. Then Gia, Jessica, Erica and Leanne are all shown talking together about Pam and her claim of supporting herself (after all, such a concept is quite the novelty amongst these ladies). Pam walks in and still clings to her having-a-job story, but she admits she was not being forthcoming in the investment banker claim (but saying nothing else).

Segment 6 (final segment -- Aside: "What Chilli Wants" was so much easier to cover -- only 30 damn minutes!): Pam and Jacqueline have struck up a friendship and have in common that they don't like Gia. They start talking about Gia in the very room where Gia will be staying. Gia gets wind of this, storms in, and orders Pam and Jacqueline to leave. Then Gia tells Jacqueline to get her "fat ass" off the bed (truth be told, the two of them have fairly equal asses, and both quite attractive). Then this rapid exchange: Jacqueline: "Bitch." Gia: "Don't ever call me a bitch -- You wish you freakin' looked like me!" Jacqueline: "Shut up." At that, Gia goes pillow-fight commando on Jacqueline's ass, twice pounding Jacqueline over the head with said pillow and threatening to "kick your ass." Chrissy restrains Gia and ushers her out of the room. Pam (sitting beside Jacqueline during this entire event) laughs and exclaims, "What just happened?!" Off in one of the only two bathrooms, Gia is crying and says that she's an emotional wreck and ready to go home. Jessica (impressively) tries to console her. Meantime, Jacqueline is also shaken, saying that she feels very out of her comfort zone and not knowing how she will survive this whole experience.

End thoughts: This was frankly some fairly wild, hilarious $hit! It's like having 9 of your most over-the-top, pompous, conceded WWE wrestlers all in the same room for one hour (except that wrestling's an exhibition, and these ladies are REAL!). Of course, I'll be back next Wednesday night to recap Episode 2! Be sure to check it out! (For the record, this is likely my LONGEST blog post ever, but that's due to the 1-hour nature of "You're Cut Off").

"Teens Face Worst Summer Job Market in 41 Years." Ouch. But Is There a Bright Side?

The story linked at bottom details the dreadful summer job market that American teenagers face this year. But is the news really all bad? For example, the one type of job that Obama's federal government has been wildly successful at "creating" in the past year has been that of the census worker. That's certainly temporary-type work and would seem perfect for the teens this summer. It sure beats the heck out of cleaning lard vats at the local Burger World, for instance.

And also on the positive side of things: If many teens are unable to garner summer employment, that will leave them with a lot more time to engage in some of their more popular pastimes, such as pounding each other in the gonads ("Sack Tapping"; see my June 2 post) and acting like Wolfmen ("Wolf Packing"; see my June 1 post). Either way (employed or not), I have little worry that American teens will find ways to occupy their time this summer. See: The news is not all bleak!

Tuesday, June 8, 2010

Look at This Goof. This Freak. This Punk.
This Subhuman Piece of Slime.


I can officially feel free to talk that way about Joran van der Sloot now that he's confessed to killing 21-year-old Stephany Flores (who was beaten to death, with her neck broken) on May 30 in Peru (story linked at bottom). Has anyone else seen the chilling hotel surveillance video of Flores & Slimeball going into his hotel room that evening -- the last time anyone would ever see her alive? Of course, the odds are about 99% that this cowardly punk also whacked out American teen Natalee Holloway in Aruba in 2005. And absolute shame on every single law enforcement officer and prosecutor in Aruba for never bringing any charges in that case -- the blood of Stephany Flores is now on their hands. Regardless, I do relish the thought of Sloot The Slime being sent to a Peruvian prison for a long, long time. If you think a young-girl-killing punk like him would have it very bad in an American prison (which he would), just imagine one in South America! HA, HA Slimeball!

Monday, June 7, 2010

Shocking Details: Teen Girl's Old Man Allegedly Gets All Charged Up, Goes Psycho, & Cattle Prods the Dude Who Sent Daughter a Pic of His Genitals.

This story's from Temecula, California, where 23-year-old Justin Moore apparently picked the wrong 17-year-old girl to whom to send a cell phone picture of Moore's package. Moore claims the photo was just a big joke, but when the gal's old man (45-year-old William Atwood) got wind of the situation, he was in no mood for laughin'. Atwood allegedly tried to lure Moore to his house under the guise of bearing the twig of peace -- allegedly telling Moore that he (Atwood) just wanted Moore to come over so that they could "discuss" the photo. But it turned out to be a fairly one-sided "discussion," because when Moore showed up at Atwood's home, all hell broke loose.

Allegedly, Atwood immediately wielded a shotgun, ordered Moore from his car, and even fired off a warning shot just for good measure. Then Atwood started pulling Moore around by his feet, injuring Moore's shoulder (allegedly). As their polite little "discussion" continued, Atwood forced to Moore to strip down and then Atwood tied him up (allegedly).

Then the "discussion" really started pickin' up. Atwood allegedly told Moore that he (Atwood) was going to "bury" Moore on a local Pechanga tribe reservation. Next, Atwood brandished a handgun and a stun gun, the latter of which Atwood allegedly used to electrically shock Moore for around 20 seconds -- asking Moore, at the same time, "how do you like it!?" Needless to say, Atwood now faces several felony charges, while Moore faces no charges (due to "lack of evidence," prosecutors say).

In the end, it's difficult to determine who's the dumber of these two idiots: The old man who thinks he can take the law into his own hands and get away with it (allegedly), or the young punk who stupidly agreed to visit the home of the father of the gal to whom he'd just sent a picture of his unit (allegedly). Remind me to add Temecula to my ever-growing list of American locales that I likely do not have any real compelling need to visit at any point in the next 100 years or so.

Sunday, June 6, 2010

I Pledge Allegiance to the Flag of the United Texas Conference of America (aka the Big 12). NOT!

Published reports this weekend are claiming that the University of Missouri and University of Nebraska have been given a Friday ultimatum to either say a "pledge of allegiance" to the Texas Conference (errrrr, Big 12) and disavow any possible interest in joining the Big 10 conference, or else risk Texas, Texas A&M, Texas Tech, Oklahoma, Oklahoma State and Colorado bolting for the Pac 10 conference (link at bottom).

Well, if this ultimatum is true, here's what Missouri and Nebraska should say to Texas and the others in no uncertain terms: Take Your Little Ultimatum and Go F*ck Yourselves! (Perhaps relaying the message a bit more diplomatically, however). Missouri and Nebraska have every right to listen to any interest that the Big 10 has expressed or is expressing, just like any of those other schools would do if they thought that a conference jump could well be in their best interests. And as for those six teams jumping to the Pac 10, I smell as much bluff as I do legitimate threat.

Is telling them to F-Off a definite risk for Missouri (frankly, I don't give a rat's behind about Nebraska)? Certainly is. But I think the risk is worth it: No way should Missouri lay down for letting those other schools dictate ultimatums that would foreclose Missouri from rightfully looking into scenarios (such as a jump to the Big 10) that might well in the best long-term interests of Missouri. In short, Missouri should worry about Missouri first and foremost. Texas, Oklahoma and the rest of them can take their ball and go rot in a Texas $hithouse somewhere for all I care.

http://www.kansascity.com/2010/06/06/1996533/mu-nebraska-wont-confirm-big-12.html

Down on The Farm, Isn't This Why They Put Decrepit Old Cows Out to Pasture?

So-called White House press corps "Queen" (more like Bigot-In-Chief) Helen Thomas this week blasts that the Jewish people need to "get the hell out of Palestine" and "go back home to Germany, Poland and America and everywhere else." Wow. Nice objectivity. Nice Bizarro World gravitating against everything that it means to be a legitimate journalist. Frankly, Nice Mahmoud Ahmadinejad impersonation! Thomas has that dude (I call him the "Little Fella") down pat! I would humbly suggest that Pasture is the only gracious way for the Wicked Bigot of the East to fade away into a background that's been calling her name for far too many years to even name anymore.

http://www.nydailynews.com/news/politics/2010/06/05/2010-06-05_white_house_press_icon_takes_heat_after_slam_of_jews.html

Friday, June 4, 2010

It's Been a Pretty Rough Week for the Two Worst Presidents of My Lifetime.


As Obama struggles to show any real leadership qualities in the Gulf oil spill disaster and as his White House continues to operate under the shadow of allegations that it offered government positions in exchange for politicians dropping out of political races, Obama's poll numbers continue to tank and he's lost any immediate ability to continue to try to foist (errr, push) his far left wing domestic agenda.

But if you think it's been a bad week for His Majesty, just get a load of the week experienced by that great neo-con warrior, W! First Bush was blamed for causing the separation of Tipper Gore and the inventor of the Internet, Al Gore, and then Bush had folks on the radical left (i.e. the little tiny faction that controls the dem party) calling the Gulf oil spill "Bush's Second Katrina." Regardless of the mindless nature of such blasts, it's hard for me to feel too sorry for The Idiot.

So as alluded, it sure's been a tough week to be an out-of-touch, ill-qualified extremist ideologue president or ex-president! Democrats and republicans: Where can I sign up?!!! NOT. And shame on your two parties for putting up these two a$$clowns for president (along with McCain, Kerry and the aforementioned Internet inventor) the last three election cycles -- the American people deserve so much better.

http://www.realclearpolitics.com/video/2010/06/01/cbs_evening_news_gores_loss_to_bush_contributed_to_separation.html

Wednesday, June 2, 2010

Dumb Teen Week Continues:
I've Heard of Breaking Another Man's Balls,
But This Is Ridiculous...

Perhaps we're starting to see the impact on the younger generation from 10 years of living under the two worst presidents of my lifetime (yes, even worse than Jimmy Carter): When today's teens aren't trying to transform themselves into a Wolfman (see yesterday's post), the males are instead occupying their free time by punching and kicking each other right in the crotch. It's called "Sack Tapping," and this moronic "game" is reportedly quite the rage among American teenage boys (linked story at bottom). Nice game --
a 14-year-old boy in Minnesota just recently lost a testicle as a result of it. After all, nothing says barrel of laughs quite like getting socked in the gonads or seeing it happen to someone else, right? These certainly must be (are) Scary Days to try to be raising young people.

http://www.foxnews.com/story/0,2933,593680,00.html

Tuesday, June 1, 2010

They Strut Right By With Their Tails In the Air: Teens Nationwide Turning Into Werewolves, Forming Wolf Packs.

Today's story from The Sun reports of "the latest craze to hit America" -- "packs of teenagers are going to school as werewolves." The "movement" reportedly involves groups of 20 or so teens forming "wolf packs" at their local high schools. The Sun reports that "the kids wear yellow contact lenses and fangs - and even fake furry tails attached to their jeans." (BTW, "furry tails"? What other kind of tail would a Wolfman wear? It's not like a smooth rat's tail is gonna jive very well with the whole werewolf image. And I'm also glad the story clarified that the werewolf tails are, indeed, merely "fake" ones).

The State of Texas appears to have been hit particularly hard by the "wolf pack" phenomenon. As one high school teacher there is quoted as saying, "They walk down the hallways swishing their tails." (Fake furry tails, mind you). Some are attributing the rise of this "cult" to movies such as Twilight and The Wolfman, but one
15-year-old "pack leader" in San Antonio (calling himself "Lupus") disputes that: "Human wolves have been around a lot longer than characters in Twilight," he howled.

As for the purpose of the wolf packs, Lupus explained: "It gives us a sense of belonging. You gain friends and you belong and indulge your wild side." (It's important for 15-year-olds to indulge the 'ol wild side, after all). Lupus' mom appears to approve of the whole wolf act just so long as sonny checks it at the door: "As soon as he walks in the door, he is supposed to take out the fangs, and lose the lenses and tail." (I can understand the prohibition on the lenses and fangs, but what harm does a little fake furry tail really do?).

But alas, the wolf pack craze has not been without controversy. Recently a follower of the movement who calls herself "Wolfie Blackheart" allegedly indulged her wild side a bit too far. The Sun reports that Wolfie "cut off a dog's head and posted pictures on the net of her boiling it." (After all, how else could Wolfie prove to her fellow wolves that she really did, in fact, boil up a dog head?).

Wolfie's defense? Well, she claims the whole incident is not quite so sinister as it's being made out. Wolfie told cops that the dog was already dead when she happened upon it. Barked Wolfie: "I would never kill a canine. I am a canine." No word yet on whether Wolfie's "I'm The Same Species" defense might actually fly in a court of law, but isn't it somewhat akin to an accused murderer claiming, "I didn't kill that man -- I'm a man myself, damn it!"?

http://www.thesun.co.uk/sol/homepage/news/2994405/Werewolf-craze-hits-US-schools.html#ixzz0pYZeAUJv