Gay Porn & Toilets -- A Recipe for Certain Disaster: Gay Porn Star Convicted of Clocking His Girlfriend Right in the Kisser with a Damn Toilet Seat!

There are certain things that just don't go together very well. Sonny & Cher. Dogs & chocolate bars. Skinheads & the Hood. Leftist 20 percenters or Texas governors & the presidency. And, now, a new example: Gay porn stars and shithouse fixtures.

He's 41-year-old former gay porn star Ryan Idol (f/k/a Marc Anthony Donais) (pictured above), and this week a jury in Sacramento convicted him of trying to whack out his girlfriend with the lid off a bathroom toilet bowl. The conviction is a real crapper for Idol (who now awaits sentencing), since it was an attempted murder charge likely to carry some serious time in a different type of can where the toilets have no lids.

This whole sordid story began with a rather demented version of the '80s TV show, "Three's Company." Idol and the girlfriend reportedly moved into a condo with one of Idol's former male lovers. And sure enough, the shitter hit the fan when girlfriend found the two men having sex.

This completely unforeseeable turn of events apparently caused girlfriend to take up residence elsewhere. A few days later, Idol reportedly engaged in a day of poker playin', whiskey drinkin', and trying to call his girlfriend over and over again (17 times total).

Unable to reach her, Idol made a beeline to her new residence -- telling her upon his arrival, "I came over here to kill you." The girlfriend says that Idol then picked her up like she was a blowup sex dummy and tossed her ass into a bathroom.

There she says Idol first started pounding her with his fists before the poker-playin' porn star tried to raise the 'ol ante. Girlfriend says Idol then ripped the lid off a nearby toilet seat and used it to smash her right in the mush. The result of this porn star's money shot was to knock out the girlfriend as blood gushed from her noggin.

Idol tried to claim self-defense at trial, but the jury wasn't buying. And I'm really not sure why. Seems only logical, after all: If some broad is attacking you, one of the first thoughts that's always going to come to mind is to run into the john and remove a toilet lid for a weapon.

I'm just surprised he didn't try to unscrew the sink faucet while he was at it so that he could go two-fisted with his weapons like a crude whirling dervish. But I guess that's why they called him Idol for his porn moniker rather than Johnny On the Spot.

http://www.sacbee.com/2011/09/22/3929141/former-gay-porn-star-ryan-idol.html
http://www.dailymail.co.uk/news/article-2040858/Ryan-Idol-convicted-attempted-murder-trying-kill-girlfriend-toilet-tank-lid.html

They Want to Make Sure It Remains the Best LITTLE Whorehouse in the Outback: Anti-Big Box Store Sentiments Sweep Into the Brothel Industry!

Bigger isn't always better. That's a cliche, but only because it (like most cliches) has some truth to it. We see that principle at work when opposition springs up to building new "big box" stores like Walmart. We see it when NCAA Division I athletic conferences in 2011 AD incessantly threaten to morph into "super conferences" but (as of yet) have never done so.

We also see it when the right-wingers say (with a fair amount of merit) that the real goal of the federal government getting involved in health care is not to enhance competition but instead to ultimately eliminate the private health insurance industry. Heck, we even see it in today's fake-boob culture, where nearly every man on the planet would agree that it is possible for a broad to have her cans made TOO large.

But now we're even seeing this principle applied to -- Whorehouses?!? So comes the news from Australia this week, where even though prostitution is legal, the Sydney city council has put the kibosh on a proposed Super Whorehouse "because it could hurt smaller bordellos." The Ma & Pop Whorehouses down under sure must have a powerful lobby.

Sure enough, "plans to supersize the [Sydney] brothel were scuttled by the city council," which "claimed on Monday that the mega-brothel might squash smaller mom-and-pop cathouses." Ma & Pop's hoes must be blowing a huge collective sigh of relief today.

The proposed Mega-Whorehouse was to feature many "rooms with multiple beds and pool tables." This trollop joint (named "Stiletto Brothel") wanted to double its number of existing rooms to 40 and (as a special added attraction) build on a new "wing for group bookings." So looks like the joint's johns -- at least if they want to book a full-fledged orgy -- are going to have to chalk up their pool sticks in someone else's back room.

Council members were reportedly mindful of the "big box" store concern, as one of them rejected the Super Whorehouse idea because it would create the "'Westfield of brothels,' referring to the country's largest shopping mall chain.'"

At the same time, however, council members want to make it damn clear that they have nothing in general against the idea of a woman auctioning off her body to the highest bidder. Said one council member: "We're not prudes, we're not opposed to brothels, but we have a policy of anti-clustering, spreading them out."

But that reasoning strikes me as having a call girl-sized hole in its logic. Because it seems the very goal of Stiletto's new Mega-Whorehouse WAS to have whores "spreading them out" from one side of the damn block to the other. Even over on the pool table.

http://www.aol.com/2011/09/20/stiletto-brothel_n_972504.html?ir=Weird%20News

Amid Scandal: Is It Splitsville for Todd & Sarah Palin? And Is Her Political Career Now Over as a Result? Before Saying "You Betcha"...

...keep in mind that these new claims are coming from the National Enquirer, which tends to be full of shit about 20 times for every story it actually gets right (democrat party VP candidate John Edwards cowering down in a hotel shithouse in 2007 AD notwithstanding).

The tabloid's now claiming that "friends close" to Sarah Palin say hubby Todd is ready to file for divorce because he's "fed up with the constant scandals" that seem to dog his buxom wife like a grizzly bear on a caribou. (Link to full story at bottom).

What's more, the Enquirer says that in light of the recent "revelations" on Palin from Joe McGinniss' upcoming book ("The Rogue: Searching for the Real Sarah Palin"), Palin's political advisers have told her that her political career is effectively over.

To wit, as McGinniss' upcoming book alleges and will reportedly detail:

-While dating Todd back in the late 80's AD, the then-sportscaster Sarah Palin engaged in her own real-life version of the film "Nailin' Palin," having a wild romp in the sack with Michigan basketball star Glen Rice.

-The Enquirer reports that the Glen Rice item made Todd feel like a "laughing stock" after it became the butt of jokes across the Net and late night TV.

-McGinniss' book reportedly contains confirmation from Sarah Palin's ex-brother-in-law Mike Wooten that Palin during her marriage had an ongoing affair with husband Todd's business partner, Brad Hanson, which caused Todd to "dissolve their snowmobile dealership after learning of it." (So THAT's where she learned to "ride" that wild baby?!?)

-Sarah's brother "Chuckie" Heath is quoted as saying that Sarah and Todd "don't have a marriage."

-The books also claims Sarah Palin once snorted cocaine off a damn oil drum! (A "55-gallon" drum, no less -- the precise volume of said drum being highly germane to the story).

-The book also claims Palin used to engage in "secret liaisons" with one of her college professors. The encounters reportedly involved plenty of puffing on the Magic Dragon, as the two smoked more tree than an Alaska logging outfit (allegedly).

-Just for good measure, the book also questions Palin's parenting skills, calling her a "bad mom" who made her kids cook their own meals while she "would lock herself in her room for hours." (No word whether any oil drums or basketball stars ever found their way into that bedroom).

Regardless of any of this foolishness, however, I've thought Palin's political career on the national level has long been over. Her negatives are not only extremely high among the general population, but also within the republic partisan party alike.

So forget her being unelectable in a general election -- she'd have virtually no chance of ever getting the right-wingers' nomination in the first place. That fact ain't changin' for better or for worse even if she bangs the whole damn Boston Celtics while doin' more blow than Tony Montana during an office sitdown.

http://www.dailymail.co.uk/news/article-2040110/Todd-Palin-file-divorce-advisers-tell-Sarah-White-House-dream-over.html

One-Stop Shopping, Sowbelly Style: St. Louis Man Allegedly Fries Himself Up Some Bacon for Breakfast While Burglarizing Woman's House!

Hey, it was the 9:00 a.m. hour on 9/20/11 AD, and the man was hungry! (Allegedly). He's 36-year-old Damon Petty (pictured above), and cops in St. Louis say Petty is a lot more than just a petty thief -- he's also allegedly a bona fide burglar and (apparently) an aspiring short-order cook.

This whole porky pilferage reportedly went down around 9:45 a.m. Tuesday, when cops say the pork-lover Petty broke into the home of Kenya Ealy. He allegedly stuffed some of her valuables in his pockets like so many porkbellies, but also couldn't resist the temptation of gettin' his grub on while he was there.

So maybe a quick baloney sandwich? Or nuke a Hot Pocket for a minute? Nope. Time just didn't seem to be of the essence for this boar-cravin' burglar (allegedly). In short, in his mind, he had time to fry some swine (allegedly). So he allegedly cooked up some bacon eats in a frying pan right there on the damn kitchen stove!

And this dude was not going to be denied his little pig out! (Allegedly). Instead, he allegedly tried to save his own bacon -- literally.

In particular, cops say that when homeowner Kenya Ealy brought home the bacon and arrived at the house with a female friend, the alleged bacon-strip burglar Petty -- with his bacon still sizzlin' on said stovetop -- tried to hold the front door shut to block the women from getting in (at least until his bacon was fully cooked -- no one wants a tapeworm from underdone pork, of course).

When the two ladies were finally permitted entry, they reportedly took to fighting the bacon-rind burglar, effectively forming a giant BLT sandwich on his ass. Cops say the tandem managed to hold Petty's snout and hooves to the griddle until the cops got a call to start shakin' their bacon on over to the joint. The Net's big-bosomed Bacon Babe (pictured below) would be proud of these broads' performance!

Now Petty may have to take his bacon as a pig in the pokey, as cops have busted him on first-degree burglary charges. He's also expected to be charged with an earlier burglary in the area in which the homeowner didn't come home during the cob roller caper.

No word yet whether Petty might have also helped himself to a little breakfast during that alleged earlier piece of work. Regardless, I'd personally advise this man to switch his early morn' preferences to eggs and grits. Youse can cook them bitches so must faster than swine sticks!

http://www.stltoday.com/news/local/crime-and-courts/article_ca51f430-e46b-11e0-a88e-0019bb30f31a.html

Suckin' on a Crack Pipe Outside the Tastee Freeze? Small Town Missouri Kindergartener Allegedly Brings Mama's Pipe & Meth to School Show & Tell!

I know the small town of Sweet Springs, Missouri. Have driven through it many times on Interstate 70 in the western half of the Show-Me State. They used to have a Taste Freeze there, just like the John Cougar Mellencamp song. Today the Tastee Freeze and its chili dogs are all gone, and Jack and Diane have apparently grown up in not such a good way...

It was show-and-tell day recently at the Sweet Springs Elementary School. Is there a more time-honored American grade school tradition than that? Little Billy brings in a turtle he found. Little Hector brings his pet rock. Fatty Four Eyes totes in an Easy-Bake cake she made. And Junior Doe whips out Mama's crack pipe and methamphetamine. Then...now wait a damn minute!

Cops in Sweet Springs say one of the kindergarteners at the school "shocked" the ol' Teach recently when Mama's pipe and meth were presented by Junior at show-and-tell. I would assume that most of the other little shits were largely oblivious to what the hell this stuff was, but obviously that's largely missing the point.

The meth reportedly had a street value of nearly four grand. I can only imagine how something like this might've gone down:

"I don't what to tell ya, Junior. I gots nothing for ya to take to that there show-and-tell. I know you already took your little skid steer toy last time. Wait! I got it. Take this here pipe. Tell 'em you use it to blow bubbles out the trailer window. And keep this bag on ya, too. I likes to keep this stuff all together. Don't you lose any of this, boy!"

Regardless, after the toddler showed up at school with the paraphernalia, cops went after and busted the little tike's 32-year-old Mama, Michelle Marie Cheatham. She's charged with possession of a controlled substance and child endangerment "in the first degree." (BTW, the law actually considers there to be "minor" ways to endanger a child, i.e. something less than in the first degree? That's a new one.)

Now the only show-and-tell for Mama may have to come during visitor hours at the local hoosegow if she's found guilty. Best advice for her: Let the Bible belt come down to save your soul or something. 'Cause don't think they got any shady trees or Bobby brooks down there at the joint. Now rock on.



http://www.huffingtonpost.com/2011/09/20/crack-pipe-show-and-tell-_n_971927.html?ir=Weird%20News

A New Low in Crime Defenses? UK Man Claims Female Attorney "Accidentally" Choked to Death While Performing Oral Sex on Him in the Backseat of Her Car

At least he didn't try to claim that the glove didn't fit. But I doubt what's sure to be called the "she choked on my chicken" defense is going to gain a whole lotta traction either. Mama Cass choking to death on a chicken bone is one thing, but this attorney dame choking to death on this man's ham bone would seem to be quite another.

48-year-old British machine worker Philip Martins (the guy above who's white) and 45-year-old "high-flying" attorney Linda Bakewell (pictured above and below) reportedly met through mutual friends. Prosecutors in the case describe Martins as a boorish lout who found Linda to be a "nuisance" but who was also "only too happy to take advantage of her affection and her wallet."

Martins would reportedly tend to become more than just a bit nasty and deranged when he was blitzed on booze and blow, which allegedly meant bad news for Linda on the night of her death. After the two went barhopping that night, Martins claims that Linda agreed to drive him to an industrial park in order to blow his horn.

Arriving at the isolated location, Martins says the two ripped off each other's clothes and slipped into the backseat of Linda's Nissan Note. There, Martins says that Linda started giving him a Lewinsky but somehow mysteriously choked herself to death during the dirty deed.

(It must have been a scene eerily reminiscent of when Teach gave student Mikey an automobile calf feeding in the '80s AD film World According to Garp, although at least there only serious injuries, including a severed tallywhacker (and no deaths), ultimately resulted).

Martins also apparently claims that he was sitting there oblivious to all of this for awhile until finally "he noticed her head was slumped and after picking up her head he noticed her eyes were open and she was dead." Yep, you can sure see how that might suddenly happen during a Gobble Gobble. Or not.

Martins reportedly admits he made no attempt to resuscitate Linda or to call for help. Instead, he claims he panicked and "did not know what to do with her body." And it showed, as he allegedly moved the naked corpse all over the damn place. What else was a guy to do, after all?

First, he allegedly drove the body home, dragged it across his yard, and deposited it on his living room floor before he retired to bed (it had been a long day). Then at some point, Martins allegedly moved it one room over, where he stuffed it (still naked) under a kitchen table. (I don't mean to pass judgment on the guy, but putting a few clothes the gal might have been nice).

Perhaps because he liked to eat on that same table -- though who really knows -- Martins allegedly later moved the body (yet again) from the kitchen table to the trunk of his car. At least, I guess, the corpse never found its way into Martins' shithouse (at least so far as we know). Martins' trunk is where cops found the body five days after the alleged incident.

And now the only Oral Roberts in Martins' future may come from the type of knowledge gained down at the local hoosegow, as Martins is currently on trial for Linda's murder. Prosecutors say there's no doubt that she died from being strangled by Martins, and not from her yafflin' the ol' yogurt cannon.

As for Martins' defense on that front, prosecutors intend to introduce medical expert testimony establishing that speaking into the mike cannot, in fact, lead to asphyxiation. And that's a good thing too. Otherwise, the guy might walk -- what, with such a whistle-tight defense like that and all.

http://www.dailymail.co.uk/news/article-2039207/Philip-Martins-charged-sex-murder-solicitor-Linda-Bakewell-Liverpool.html

Is Obama a "Sexist, Egotistical, Lying, Hypocritical" Leftist? Although He'd Surely Say, "Who You Callin' Sexist," a New Book Claims Exactly That...

He treated his female employees like meat. Hence the moniker, "Sexist, Egotistical, Lying, Hypocritical" Bossman. His name was Franklin Hart, and his character from the '80s AD film 9 to 5 (famously played by Dabney Coleman) was one of the most notorious and biggest workplace scoundrel bosses in movie history.

When that slimeball wasn't demanding that his secretary (Dolly Parton) come over to his house after work in order to pound his keys, he was constantly ordering one of his managers (Lily Tomlin) to go fetch coffee for him and go buy gifts for said secretary. Even Jane Fonda could not escape that Bossman's wrath.

Now a new book coming out this week claims that Obama's White House isn't much different when it comes to imposing a highly hostile and sexist work environment for women. In short, the book claims "Obama's White House is a 'hostile environment for females that treats women like meat.' " (Links to full story at bottom). Gee, that sounds a bit familiar.

The new book -- written by Ron Suskind and entitled "Confidence Men: Wall Street, Washington and the Education of a President" -- quotes one high-ranking female White House official as saying "the president has a real woman problem."

This allegedly included Obama calling on only males during staff meetings and virtually always having his numerous golf outings be "all-male affairs." Questions are also raised over Obama's choice of Jay Carney over Karen Finney to replace Robert Gibbs as White House press secretary.

The book also reports that women in Obama's White House have generally felt "excluded," "ignored," "sidelined," "talked over," and "left out" by a pervasive "boy's club" mentality for which Obama was "responsible himself" along with other males such as former chief of staff Rahm Emanuel (now the mayor of Chicago).

The allegations also stretch back to Obama's 2008 AD campaign, where the Obama campaign is accused by female staffers of "being deliberately sexist," with no one being allowed to "offer a female perspective" on such things as campaign advertisements.

Former White House communications director Anita Dunn is even quoted in the book as claiming that the shabby treatment of females at the White House could be viewed as rising to the level of actionable sexual discrimination in a court of law:

"It actually fit all of the classic legal requirements for a genuinely hostile workplace to women," Dunn is quoted as saying. Ouch. She's reportedly now backing away from that alleged comment, but author Suskind is sticking by it.

Now, ultimately in the film 9 to 5, the oppressed and harassed lady employees got their revenge on the sexist Bossman Mr. Hart, first by incapacitating him with rat poison in his coffee and a bad bump on the head caused by a bum office chair (neither intentionally, but instead mistakenly through seemingly subconscious actions).

Next the ladies chained up Mr. Hart like a dog (this time intentionally) in his own home for weeks on end. They even take a pot shot at him and hoist his rotten ass up in the air with a kinky S&M-type contraption.

Mr. Hart eventually escapes his captivity, only to be promptly shipped off to South America by Captain McCluskey, where the infamous Bossman is abducted by a tribe of Amazon women, never to be heard from again.

And this is where I just can't see life imitating art, as I can't see any of those crazy events occurring with respect to Obama. He gets his drink on with beer, not coffee, and Captain McCluskey long since got whacked out in Louis' Restaurant in the Bronx.

Not to mention, the only one-way ticket I see Obama possibly getting will take him only as far as Chicago for a permanent reunion with Emanuel come November 2012 AD.

http://www.washingtonpost.com/politics/suskind-book-female-advisers-in-obama-white-house-sidelined-and-ignored/2011/09/16/gIQAAOSSXK_print.html
http://www.dailymail.co.uk/news/article-2038386/Obamas-White-House-hostile-environment-women-treated-like-meat.html?ito=feeds-newsxml

We've Got LeftNecks in Charge? The Obamas Set Up Their Own White House Still for Making Alcohol; Uncle Jesse Tells the Law to Leave Them Alone...

What's next? His Majesty and The Queen bitterly clinging to their Bibles while they tote rifles to a local tea party rally in September 2011 AD? These questions follow the news this week that the Obamas have used their own money to set up a rudimentary, makeshift still at the White House for brewing up booze.

The White House-made brew was reportedly flowing like water when Obama had his photo op this week with Congressional Medal of Honor recipient Dakota Meyer. It's just too bad the still wasn't already up and running when Obama held his notorious "beer summit" in 2009 after blathering about the arrest of a Harvard professor without knowing any of the facts.

It's also unfortunate to see the Obamas gettin' their drink on in such a fashion that they've apparently become the same sort of "LeftNecks" that the democrat party and leftist 20 percenters loathe so much.

If you're not familiar with that term, it's used by the lefties to insult the small swath of largely blue-collar, unionized democrat party voters who depart from the leftist agenda on certain discrete issues, such as gun ownership and the importance of religion. The LeftNecks are viewed as particularly dangerous by the leftists since they've been known to transform into "Reagan democrats" on occasion.

If there's anything that just might be the final straw before the leftist 20 percenter fringe (which controls the democrat party) decides to primary Obama's hapless ass, it just might be this new alcohol still at the White House. And Oh My, the thought of Obama boozin' it up by using the still to make BEER rather than Chardonnay and Merlot must REALLY chap the elitist leftists' asses!

On the primary front, methinks the leftist 20 percenters need to break the glass on the case that says "Open If in Need of Vile Leftist Loudmouth." From there, reach inside, pull Howard Dean out, hose him down, and put him to work. Hell, they could even dress Dean up like Sheriff Roscoe T. Coaltrain and have him feign a revenuer raid on the new Obama White House still:

"Yer under arrest for moonshinin', Mr. President! Yooz been hidin' revenue from Uncle Sam. And not only am I gonna toss you in the can in New Hampshire. Next I'm locking your ass up in South Carolina! And Arizona and North Dakota and New Mexico! YEAH!!!! Kew, kew, kew, kew."

After all, Obama -- the most leftist president of my lifetime and perhaps in American history -- hasn't been nearly leftist enough. Just ask the leftist 20 percenters. They'll tell ya.

But just don't ask them for a beer at the same time (given this week's news) unless your goal is for Jimmy Hoffa Junior's boys to give you the same treatment that was given to Hoffa's old man. Since while I might not mind drinking some beer in the Meadowlands parking lot on an NFL Sunday, I sure as hell wouldn't want to be buried there.

http://www.cbsnews.com/stories/2011/09/16/earlyshow/main20107292.shtml

A Lesson for Unmarried Men Everywhere: If You Want the Love, Wear a Damn Glove. Lest You Want to be Taken to the Cleaners by a Broad Like This...

She's Canadian cover girl model Linda Evangelista, and she's trying to get her French baby daddy to surrender. Seems she shacked up with Frenchman Francois-Henri Pinault circa 2007 AD, got knocked up, and now she just wants her fair share -- all in the name of the baby, of course.

That's because even though Evangelista isn't married to Frenchie (and I'm always amazed how many men don't know this), he's still on the hook for child support as the baby daddy. And in this instance, we ain't talkin' peanuts.

Evangelista is looking for the better part of a million bucks a year (over $800,000) in child support. Maybe she's looking to buy the little punk his own string of Babies"R"Us stores?

That total includes an excruciating $46,000 per MONTH in standard child support. But that's just for starters. Evangelista also wants almost $200,000 a year for "a team of armed drivers" to haul the little shit around town. And don't forget the nanny! $80,000 more for that little "necessary" expense. Jeezal peezal, already.

And if you're wondering about Frenchie, he ain't exactly what you'd call a poor soul. He's CEO of a company that owns Gucci and other luxury lines, which nets him a $5 million annual salary.

Still though, he doesn't exactly sound like George Soros or Warren Buffet over there. $5 million puts you at about the pay grade of an above-average major league baseball player.

But on the bright side for Frenchie, at least he need not fear Obama and the democrat party coming after him like Evangelista's wrath. Nope, those particular politicians are mainly concerned these days with "millionaires and billionaires" who own small businesses making $200,000 a year.

So when it comes to Obama, Frenchie's as safe as Jeffrey Immelt in a West Wing shithouse. And he's gonna need that extra money for when Evangelista gets through with his smelly French ass, it would appear.

http://www.nypost.com/p/news/local/manhattan/model_child_support_queeze_dNsnebr3SNsZNLI2mRiq6J
http://www.thetowntalk.com/article/20110912/NEWS/110912002/Obama-Incomes-200-000-up-will-help-pay-jobs-bill?odyssey=nav|head

Nailin' Palin, Indeed! As New Book Alleges Sarah Palin Banged Basketball Star Glen Rice in the Late '80s AD, I Can Only Imagine Her Pillow Talk...

As you've probably by now heard, the allegations from the upcoming Joe McGinniss book are being reported in the National Enquirer. McGinniss writes that Sarah Palin in 1987 AD -- less than a year before she married high school sweetheart Todd Palin -- threw herself at and shacked up with then-Michigan basketball star Glen Rice while he was playing in the Great Alaska Shootout. Sarah Palin was a local sports reporter at the time (picture at top/link to story at bottom).

Now, rather than injecting into this item, like everybody else out there, (1) a 1000 obvious basketball puns, (2) some rather inappropriate racial "humor" or (3) the cliched phrase "Drill Baby Drill," I'm taking a slightly different tact. The "High Road," you might say.

In so doing, I give you the Top Ten things Sarah Palin might have said while she was getting boned by Glen Rice (allegedly). (And never mind it was 1987):

10. "So THAT's what the 'Bush Doctrine' means?"

9. "Refudiate me good, like it was 1789, you Patriot!"

8. "You can rear your head in Alaska air space any damn time."

7. "Now THOSE are what I call some big cajones!"

6. "Hit that Fannie Mae with your Freddie Mac, you betcha!"

5. "Just get a load of these fake boobs -- don't they feel, like, Realsville, Daddy-O?"

4. "Ooo, why can't the 'lamestream media' give me this kind of coverage?!"

3. "Ring my bells, fire your gun, and ride me like a plow horse, Paul Revere!"

2. "Super secret agent hose pipe has infiltrated the tea party!"

1. "How ya like the taste a' THEM crosshairs?!"

http://www.nydailynews.com/news/politics/2011/09/14/2011-09-14_sarah_palin_had_sex_with_basketball_player_snorted_cocaine_and_cheated_on_husban.html?r=news