


I guess she wasn't too full of the milk of human kindness. Cops in Delaware, Ohio say it all started off quietly enough, as bosomy 30-year-old Stephanie Robinette (mugshot above) and her husband attending a lovely wedding and reception at the local banquet and conference center. But the milk only soured after that.Robinette first allegedly got plastered on booze at the reception. Then this shapely sot reportedly took to fighting with her old man, busting him one right in the chops and clocking him several more times.
Maybe this sloshed soak needed to go breastfeed the brat or something, because the next thing you know, she's allegedly scurrying off to the parking lot to lock herself in the old man's car. That's when the cops showed up after receiving a call for a domestic dispute at the knot tying.
Cops reportedly couldn't get the full-bosomed boozer to get out of the car and had to try to force her fun bags right on out. This coerced action apparently didn't sit too well with this pie-eyed, plus-sized dame, and so she allegedly proceeded to give cops a piece of her mind and a lot more.
Cops says Robinette first warned them that "she was a breast feeding mother." Perhaps thinking that the cops didn't believe that story, this smashed double-stack set out to corroborate her own story herself. And while I've heard of taking matters into your own hands, this was ridiculous:
Cops say Robinette then "removed her right breast from her dress and began spraying deputies and [her] vehicle with breast milk."
After this lactacting lush reportedly milked her sizable rack for all it was worth, cops say they were eventually able to fully extract Robinette and her honkers from the car and slap the ol' cuffs on her.
Now this boozin' babe will probably want to cry over her spilled milk, since she faces charges of domestic violence, assault (the breast milk spray?), obstructing official business, resisting arrest and disorderly conduct. That means she may have to milk her cans in the Jug for awhile to come, since them's a lot of charges.
And leave it to the cops to turn this milky white incident into a little lesson that civilians everywhere should keep in mind as they go through life: "This is a prime example of how alcohol can make individuals do things they would not normally do," spouted the local sheriff. Moo juice for thought. Sheriff Taylor's no milk toast over there.

Oh. My. Gosh. That sounds like a wild plot theme for the new lawyer show on TNT, "Franklin & Bash"! They'd get the charges dropped! ha!
ReplyDeleteMuch like that breast milk she was allegedly firing around, I think these charges will probably stick. There's just too much physical evidence, it would appear.
ReplyDeleteProbably some DNA in there too, huh? EWWWWW....
ReplyDeleteDairy Nips Afirin'?
ReplyDeleteSounds like they were a'firin' alright....good thing no one got their eye poked out =)
ReplyDeleteI hadn't thought of that. One could put an eye out like that.
ReplyDeleteA boob in the eye is not such a bad thing...boob milk in the eye, on the other hand, not so good..
ReplyDeleteI don't know that I'd want either one of those things poking me in the eye. Detached retina just waiting to happen.
ReplyDeleteAlright, your point is made =) Killjoy =)
ReplyDeleteKilroy Was Here.
ReplyDeleteDomo Arigato =)
ReplyDeleteWere you the lead singer for The Vapors?
ReplyDeleteYes. And also, Styx. =)
ReplyDeleteMan, Styx sure has a number of songs I can't stand. I like "Renegade," though.
ReplyDeleteRenegade is great! I like all the Tommy Shaw songs...those are my faves from Styx. Check out "Blue Collar Man" that one rocks too =)
ReplyDeleteDennis DeYoung sang "Desert Moon" in the 80's. Boy was that one sappy.
ReplyDeleteThat one must be so sappy I don't even remember it....I like rock much better than sap. Except for Christopher Cross, of course, he's the exception =)
ReplyDeleteUpdate on this story from over the weekend: The breast-milk spraying woman was apparently a grade school teacher and she got her walking papers over the incident. Her excuse was that she was just trying to show the cops that she is, actually, a breast-feeding mother by spraying at them. She was trying to prove it to them.
ReplyDelete