[This one is dedicated to Kansas City media icon Bill Grigsby, who passed away yesterday. Grigs always did his own unique thing, which is the only way to be]:I think this babe might have listened to one too many Jimi Hendrix tunes (first link at bottom):
Much like Cosby Kid Lisa Bonet's wild ass "voodoo chile" character in the old film Angel Heart (in which Bonet has a crazy voodoo-frenzied romp in the sack with Mickey Rourke), cops say a Brooklyn woman got her voodoo on in a big way with her "witch doctor," ultimately igniting a five-alarm apartment building fire that killed one man and left 100 homeless (second link at bottom to the New York Post's full story).
Cops say this dame "was just looking for some good luck in her life" and paid 300 bucks to the "horny holy man" who lived at the apartment building so that he would send some of his special voodoo magic her way. (BTW, cops aren't releasing either person's name, age or description).
Things got rolling when the willing wizard first sprinkled rum on his apartment floor to ward off "evil spirits." But there was a catch! He told the broad that they would have to do a voodoo sex ritual in order for her luck to turn around. I mean, I've heard of "getting lucky," but this absolutely ridiculous.
"The witch doctor and his voodoo doll then proceeded to romp on a bed that was perilously surrounded by a large number of ritual candles." And then this female voodoo chile discovered a very strange thing faster than a ménage a trois suggestion on a "Seinfeld" episode: This whole voodoo sex rite thing -- She was into it!
She reportedly told firemen that "while she was having sex, she was getting aroused, she was getting into it and she didn't realize that their activity had knocked over some of the candles around the bed." And apparently the witch doctor was paying scant attention himself, as the "wild candlelit sex ritual" turned "hot and heavy" – literally.
The toppled candles quickly set fire to clothing and linen on the floor, and the next thing you know, the whole room was on fire! Said the cops: "The sex must have been so good they didn't see it coming. Maybe they should have practiced safe sex." Safe voodoo, more like it.
But this relatively small and contained fire only turned catastrophic and deadly through the comedy of errors that followed. First, instead of calling 911, the voodoo priest – apparently not so much the "flaming" wit (pun intended) -- tried to put out the room fire himself by tossing water on it which he had conjured up from a bathroom sink. Nothin' doing.
Then another man in the same apartment who "was ironing his pants" reared his ugly trousers in this whole debacle. But before we get into that, can you just picture this scene:
Witch doctor roommate and the voodoo doll are having wild ritualistic voodoo sex there in the apartment, and this other roommate dude is off in some corner just casually ironing his britches while it's all going down?! He had his business to attend to, and they had theirs, I suppose!
Regardless, roommate dude only made a rapidly deteriorating situation even worse when he spotted the fire, panicked, and opened a damn window! This let the "wind blow in, which fanned the already-high flames into a massive inferno."
While the roommate, the warlock and his sexy spellbinder were all able to successfully get the hell out of there at that point, they made their third huge mistake when they left the apartment door open behind them!
Firemen say that 40 mph winds then "created a blowtorch effect as winds whipped in through the open window and pushed fire out into the hallway" through the open door.
As the blaze eventually moved through significant portions of the building, a retired school counselor was killed, dozens of tenants were left homeless, and 20 firemen were injured.
As for the sloppy sorcerer and his voodoo squeeze, "no charges are expected" -- quite astonishingly and even despite this voodoo high priest reportedly initially lying to police about what was going on inside his apartment. The woman was only there to "deliver him food," he told cops at first before later fessin' up.
You'd think the cops might at least try to nail the sex-crazed soothsayer with a false statement rap? But maybe the cops were afraid that if they tried throwing the book at the witch doctor, he might hit them in return with some of his sordid sex sorcery and/or toss a curse their way? Prudent police work, methinks.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Pz_kHIBVdUc
http://www.nypost.com/p/news/local/brooklyn/fatal_klyn_fire_was_hex_rated_N0NlwUMYxxfrOEb1o7FSvN
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