Wednesday, June 27, 2012

Stink 'Em Up: 72-Year-Old Man "Accused of Threatening Farting New Jersey Neighbor with a Gun"!






There are many ways of reacting to a stinkpot who goes around breaking wind in public: A raised eyebrow. A critical word. A stoic stare. An unapproving nod. Or even, in today's discourse, it seems -- a .32 caliber Smith and Wesson to the noodle. (I just would've hated to see the result if this neighbor had instead talked about the dude's Mama)...

According to cops in New Jersey, 72-year-old Daniel Collins (pictured above) really hates it when folks cut the cheese in his presence.  Either that, or his neighbor is just one hell of a raw ass.  Either way, cops say Collins smelled and cried foul in a big way last week when his neighbor let 'er rip right out there in the apartment complex common area.

Specifically, cops say an "ongoing dispute" between the two concerning the "neighbor's flatulence" finally turned into a combustible methane blast furnace when this stinkweed Neighbor pushed his putrid-smelling luck one time too many by "passing gas near Collins' apartment door."

And I take it that shit didn't just stink, but could've waken the dead, since an alerted Collins was allegedly out that apartment faster than a stinkbug infestation in a Mississippi shithouse.  And Collins didn't burst out there just looking to throw a few fists, neither...

Nope, Collins allegedly came at his smelly neighbor brandishing a .32 caliber piece and proceeded to "point the revolver at the flatulent neighbor" right out there in vestibule!  "I'm going to put a hole in your head," Collins allegedly howled (the head being the logical choice since I'd imagine Collins wanted no part of opening up a second blow hole in that neighbor's rotten ass).

But now Collins may have to take his counter-stink antics down to the local stir, since cops blew their own butt bugle at him with a bevy of filthy charges, including aggravated assault, unlawful possession of a weapon, and "terrorists threats."  Talk about a .32 caliber backfire.

http://www.huffingtonpost.com/2012/06/26/daniel-collins-neighbor-farting-gun_n_1628761.html?ref=topbar