It's never difficult to find Jose. Always leaves a trail of rubbish behind him. Allegedly...I'll say this: He must've been famished. Real famished. Since cops in Eloy, Arizona say Jose Lopez, Jr. (mug shot above) just couldn't keep his sweet tooth in check last week when he went to pull a heist down at the local party shop.
Sure (cops say), Lopez made sure to pocket some loot during this piece of work -- a couple grand in cash and jewelry. But it was the joint's candy inventory that really seemed to captivate this walking Nestle Crunch Bar (allegedly). "All the chocolates were gone, completely," complained the store's owner.
And not only that -- Lopez wasn't just gonna haul that sweet score away like so many necklaces and dead presidents. Nope. He was gonna eat it. Right there. Right then. And ALL the way home, baby!
That's why it took cops some "old fashioned police work" to solve this one. Noticing a trail of chocolate bar wrappers leading away from the store, the thought occurred to someone that maybe they oughta just follow that there trail.And a smart move it was. Cops say they were able to follow the trail of candy debris for a quarter mile -- straight (you guessed it) to Lopez's pad. And it's not like the chocolate bar remnants are the only evidence the cops have here...
They've reportedly also been able to match a footprint from the party shop to a footprint along the wrapper trail. Needless to say, the latter footprint was "surrounded by candy wrappers."
Now Lopez may have to listen to the Snickers of others for some time to come down at the hoosegow, since cops have busted his candy ass on three charges of burglary, theft and possession of pot. But how he's escaping justice for all that damn littering, I have no idea. C'mon and give a hoot, cops!
http://abcnews.go.com/News/arizona-thief-leaves-candy-wrapper-trail-police/story?id=15722214#.T0BY8ocgdDs
http://www.abc15.com/dpp/news/region_central_southern_az/other/crook-breaks-in-to-bakery
http://www.dailymail.co.uk/news/article-2103034/Dumb-burglar-grabbed-candy-break-leads-police-straight-door-trail-sweet-wrappers.html
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Yeah,cops! Give a hoot! Keep the Indian (or should I say Native American) from shedding that single tear.....those commercials always made me cry.
ReplyDeleteI'm mixing up all kinds of memories over here. Did the crying Indian say "give a hoot don't pollute"? I think maybe he didn't talk and just cried, but I could have it all wrong.
ReplyDeleteThe crying Indian didn't say a word, he didn't need to....the owl said 'give a hoot' but I don't remember if the owl had a name??
ReplyDeleteWas he called Sitting Crying Owl?
ReplyDeleteWoodsy Owl! Now I remember =)
ReplyDeletehttp://www.youtube.com/watch?v=gZB7gSQRIuM
It's a hazy recollection, but I think they tried to cast him in the role of the mechanical metallic owl in Clash of the Titans (80s version), but then when he started crying a river (as he was prone to do), the whole costume rusted into complete immobility. Suffice it so say, they had to come up with a new owl for that piece of work (not to mention a whole new metal owl get-up).
ReplyDeleteMajor costume flaw which they did not anticipate =)
ReplyDeleteWhen it comes to the Indian and owl pollution campaigns, they need to get House speaker John Boehner involved, since he can cry on cue all day long (and I won't even say a word about his skin hue).
ReplyDeleteWe could name him, "Boehny The Owl" =)
ReplyDelete"Party Time" Bonnie's also been known to smoke like a fish and drink like a chimney, so why not also cry like an owl or an Indian? That is, if he can find time to break away from happy hours and staring at Pelosi's ass.
ReplyDelete