Friday, November 25, 2011

Just Think: When Her 51-Year-Old Hubby is 75, His 17-Year-Old Bride's Face May Look Something Like ... 110!!!



And then they'll be asking his sorry old hide, "Why'd you ever marry that old prune?" It's the highly controversial couple up close and personal: 51-year-old actor Doug Hutchinson and his 17-year-old teen bride, Courtney Stodden. 17, uh? More like 17 going on 40, and I ain't even talking about her big (alleged) fake rack!

The current set of pics comes from the alleged 17-year-old "stepping out" this week in a "tight white top which showed off her large chest" as she joined her old man (literally) "to take sacks of clothing to a donation center." [Kudos to the cool charity work, all kidding aside.]

But it wasn't all just charitable business over there, as the young Courtney was observed to make damn sure she "ensured she flashed her famous chest in the tiny white boob tube." And since this gal ain't even technically of age (allegedly), I gots no comment on the merits of any of that.

However, the main issue I spotted here was that face. Sure, looks great, very pretty. But if Courtney's truly only 17, what gives with the New Jersey Sopranos, late-30's trying to look like she's still young, gun moll look? Last time I saw a face like that, Silvio Dante was trying to whack it out in the Rancocas Woods off the Turnpike. And now we don't talk about Adriana no more. Jeezal peezal.

And just think what that alleged teenage mush is gonna look like when she's really 35 or 40? Or, dare I ask, 50 even? She may at that point make her old man look like a damn spring chicken who's still a fuzzy shade a' yella.

Tell me now: Who really got the short end of this alleged May-September romance? Only Courtney turning 60 (errr, 35) will bring an answer to that particularly sordid question, methinks.