Tuesday, September 27, 2011

tea party Take Note: You Might Actually Connect with More Than Just the Right-Wing Fringe If You Took to Protesting Like THESE People in Utah...



Sorry tea partiers, but Paul Revere get-ups, leftist-style three and four-word catchphrases, and endless "Don't Tread on Me" flags just don't resonate that much with (1) many Independents, (2) virtually any potentially disaffected democrat party voter or (3) much of anyone under the age of 40 or 50. You should take a cue from these protesters in Utah. To wit:

Retire the 1776 AD costumes; let your hair down; and take your damn tops (and wigs) off!!! I mean, just look at some of those hotties! They were strippin' down to their undies in Salt Lake City over the weekend to protest what they see as social conservatitism run amok in the Mormon Jerusalem. Bra and panty match, anyone?

Although these barely legal protesters were unified in the common goal of disrobing just as far as (or a little bit more than) the law would allow, their actual underlying causes seemed as diverse as the bug population in an Alabama shithouse.

Some were pissed off about new, more stringent alcohol laws in Utah. Others wanted to show their support for legalized gay marriage. Still others seemed to lack a specific, concrete cause at all, simply writing cute-sounding general proclamations on their largely bare torsos -- such as "support = rights" and "judge not les [sic] ye be judged." Works for me!

Although this protest is an annual event called the "Utah Undie Run," it drew a whopping 3000 people this year after never before drawing more than 55. The 3000 figure will reportedly set some sort of Guinness Book world record if it's verified ("biggest bra & panty party ever," I would assume).

Ultimately, the goal was "to change Utah," said the event's organizer. And so enthusiastic were some of the female protesters, apparently, that they even started rhyming their words when asked why they were there with little more than a stitch of clothing to cover their midsections and often bosomy top halfs.

Said the participants' website, specifically: "We've all heard it for yours: Utah is boring, Utahans are uptight. Well it's time to change all that. At least for a night."

Sounds like the damn "Night Before Christmas"! And again, more that the tea party could take away from this event: Forget the Fourth of July -- talk like it's Christmas, dress like it's Mardi Gras, and party like it's 1999 AD, baby!