You don't have to be that mullet-headed redneck dude from Office Space for it be your ultimate man-dream: It's called getting a couple of broads to double up on ya. The threesome. The meat sandwich. The triumvirate. The Fanny Jaffle. Or most famously: The menage a trois. But every bored man's dream allegedly turned into a triple-headed nightmare for one Naples, Florida man and his two prospective clam cousins this week...Cops say the event actually got off to a beautiful start, with Jorge Daniel Silva (mugshot above) jumping in the sack with his wife and a second woman after the threesome got all liquored up on alcohol. Some lovely making out between the trifecta jumped off from there, but that's when this little threeway freeway suddenly got jammed up worse than this year's Camaro Day on the Kansas Turnpike.
Before he could even so much as start playing the piano or request a downhill double dip, Jorge allegedly flew into an complete rage and "freaked out" during the opening gambit smooch session of this makeshift French Connection. Really ticked off for some reason, Jorge first allegedly started pounding his old lady right in the mush, which prompted to two ladies to scurry away and take cover in a spare bedroom.
But it was gonna take a lot more than just a little locked door to stop this trio-spurning sleazejam. Cops says hubby broke the door down and took to "swinging a TV" at the old lady "like a bat." Jorge allegedly clocked wifey twice with the boob tube before dropping the box right on top of her just for good measure.
The television now apparently destroyed, cops say Jorge would not be deterred, as he simply grabbed a second television in the house and threw that one at the old lady too (allegedly). When the third piece of this clambake trinity tried to intervene, Jorge allegedly started giving the second woman a good beatdown as well!But as one might expect, hubby ain't without a couple of defenses over there. First, he says the only reason he got mad was because the two ladies were smoochin' it up and wouldn't let him split any wood or get in on the action. The party poopers. No wonder he want "occupy wall street" on their trizzy asses (allegedly).
Second, he says the only reason he did a King Kong on the bedroom door was because he thought the two ladies had run in there to start having sex without him. Of course, as I'm sure he'd maintain, he never considered that their disappearing act might have resulted from him trying to turn wifey's head into a moose burger back in the couple's bedroom.
Regardless, cops eventually arrived at the house to find the old lady covered in blood, with a face that looked like a hot-air balloon with the basket missing, not to mention a broken schnoz. They busted Jorge on felony battery charges, meaning his next tryst in triplicate may have to be the 3-boy, corn-cob tripod variety deep inside the state hoosegow. But what's he gonna do for a TV in there?
http://www.nbcmiami.com/news/Naples-Man-Charged-With-Battering-Wife-After-Threesome-Takes-Wrong-Turn-133458933.html
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