I get the whole Harvard University study from last week. The "study" basically equated July 4 parades with GOP propaganda events and purported to find that if you attend July 4 parades, then you have a better chance of becoming a republic partisan than if you skip the Independence Day celebrations. But the so-called "increased chances" were miniscule -- to me, almost to the point of being statistically insignificant.But don't tell that to 40-year-old Rhode Island resident Gloria Hodge. Cops in Randolph, Massachusetts say that once she and her car happened upon the local July 4 parade yesterday, this broad couldn't get away fast enough. And regardless of whether or not Hodge even saw the Harvard study last week, this much was clear: She wasn't gonna be sticking around for any damn July 4 parades!
Cops say Hodge "drove past a barrier and into the parade, narrowly missing spectators and continued for about 30 miles before crashing her car" across the state line in her native Rhode Island (pictures above). And this lead-footed dame wasn't just sashaying her way through the parade and the rest of two states (allegedly): Eyewitnesses say she plunged through the parade at 50 MPH and then was topping 80 MPH during the rest of her little joyride.
And the scariest moments of the whole ordeal had to be for those poor parade goers -- who not only had to endure the GOP propaganda event, but also the deranged speed demon who tried to rain on the parade (allegedly). Cops say that as Hodge "cut through the procession," "children lining the parade route had to scatter from the street as the woman careened through the busy streets."
According to one parade goer: "She was just barreling down the street at least 40 or 50 miles an hours." Said another: "She was just going into the parade, people were just dipping and dodging out of her way." When Hodge's alleged little race of horrors ended with a crash 30 miles later, she was reportedly rushed to the hospital in stable condition.
Once she recovers, she may have to start avoiding her GOP propaganda from the confines of a cell at the local joint, as cops have busted her for assault with a dangerous weapon, driving to endanger and failure to stop. I wonder if Harvard (being the liberal, enlightened institution that it is) offers online correspondence courses for cons?
Posts
