Coldfellas: It's "The Obama Way" on Full Display, As Brooklyn Ice Cream Man Brings Knife to a Fight with Competitor, But Gets Coned w/ a Baseball Bat!

As I listen today to the 1,000th democrat party member tell me this week to act with more "civility," I see this crazy story from the New York Post and am reminded of Obama's famous line, "If they bring a knife to a fight, we bring a gun!" Well, that may be "The Chicago Way," but in the Big Apple you don’t need a piece at a knife fight – just a Louisville Slugger!

The whole incident started when ice cream delivery man Steven Perez ("Stevie") (pictured above) allegedly "tried to carve up a rival like a banana split." Stevie -- the "regular ice cream supplier" to a local grocery store -- saw competitor Homero Jaramillo attempting to muscle in on his business by "trying to sell some cut-rate Haagen-Dazs to the shop’s owner."

This apparently didn't cut the mustard with Stevie, who then allegedly proceeded to try to cut the custard by going after his ice cream rival with a box cutter! Perhaps suffering from momentary brain freeze, Stevie allegedly screamed: "I'll kill you! I'll kill you!" Put another way, Stevie "threatened to turn his dessert-dealing rival into rocky road."

It reportedly took the store owner and his brother to restrain Stevie, which gave Homero a chance to lickety-split-it right out the joint’s front door faster than a pistachio puma. But "the cold war didn't end there." Not by a long shot.

Homero allegedly went to his truck, scooped up a baseball bat like it was vanilla ice cream, and headed back into the store to get a piece of the box cutter-wielding Stevie (allegedly)! Give me a bat over a knife any day, as the ice cream peddling competitor reportedly creamed Stevie right across his back side with the lumber! Home run, Homero. Nothing soft serve about it.

The store owner says Homero's bat shot was "self defense," while Stevie claims he never brandished any box cutter in the first place. But they'll have to tell it to the judge, since each of these sorbet warriors may have to spend some time cooling off in the can as opposed to the ice cream parlor:

After all the chocolate chips had settled, cops threw the book at both ice cream fighters with charges of assault, "menacing" and harassment – which could put both men on ice for a while to come. I wonder if they serve Haagen-Dazs in the hoosegow?

http://www.newyorkpost.com/p/news/local/brooklyn/ice_cream_cold_war_BrqhnEoBPyuqhDadB1jgaI