Episode Synopsis: It's a weird episode as the Salahis are completely segregated in their storylines from the rest of the cast. And as for the rest of the cast: It's a steady diet of Gay Marriage, Gay Marriage, Gay Marriage, and them just for good measure, a bit more Gay Marriage! Plus some nice Cat-Erika fireworks light up the middle of the show!
Segment 1: At Cat’s house, she and husband Charles are looking at photos of Cat to possibly use on the cover of her upcoming book, “Inbox Full.” Charles (a White House photographer), who is about to leave town again, details his itinerary in the days to come. It includes taking photos of political types Bill Clinton, Nancy Pelosi and Tim Geithner as well as General Petraeus and the film director, Peter Jackson. As usual, Cat is not very excited about Charles being gone again.
Michaele Salahi is at the Willard Hotel in DC in the Thomas Jefferson Suite (the Four Seasons and its Royal Suite must have been all booked up this week). She’s with husband Tareq and practicing her cheerleading moves. She says that she’s a former Washington Redskins cheerleader (the first I’ve heard of that) from the 1980’s. She indicates she’ll be attending some halftime show at the Redskins first home game of the season. She also brags that she’s “building an empire” (I guess that’s one way of putting it) with her husband.
Then Michaele, sporting pom-poms, shows up at a cheerleading practice. I’m guessing that the halftime show will consist of a cheerleading routine by former Skins cheerleaders (assuming Michaele is telling the truth, which IS a big If), as the cheerleaders at this practice all look a bit older like Michaele. As they practice, it appears that Michaele is having problems following the routine.
At Stacie’s house, Stacie’s in the kitchen with her kids and friend Erika. Cat shows up with her daughters and Mary shows up with one of her sons. Cat and Erika are laughing it up (after Erika “teases” Cat about being “mean”), but there does seem to be some tension simmering between them (likely based on some of Cat’s past comments and/or behavior). The kids then engage in a game of guessing which mom is the oldest and which is the youngest. One of Cat’s daughters guesses that Cat is the youngest, and that the oldest “has to be Mary” (Ouch).
With the kids eating ice cream in the kitchen, the four ladies head off to the living room for wine and snacks. That’s when Lynda shows up. She says that celebrity stylist Paul Wharton is going to be hosting an upcoming meeting with DC city council member David Catania, and that everyone will be invited. Stacie notes that Catania is a “primary champion” for gay marriage (which I never realized was a big issue in municipal politics) in DC. Off camera, Stacie seems to indicate that she’s not quite sure how she feels about the whole gay marriage issue.
Then BOMBSHELL! Mary starts talking about Michaele’s claim to be a former Redskins cheerleader and says that Michaele is making the whole thing up! (NO! Who’da thunk!). Lynda wonders how someone can fabricate as much Michaele allegedly does. In a funny line, Lynda qips, “do you have to have a lobotomy in order to [act like Michaele]?”
Segment 2: The ladies are still hanging out at Stacie’s house, talking about Mary’s daughter Lolly. Then Fireworks! After one of Cat’s comments, Erika starts breakin’ Cat’s balls again, spouting: “That’s the mean girl coming out!” Cat is visibly starting to get perturbed with Erika, and the two commence to bickering. Cat does not like being called “mean” all the time by Erika, but Erika basically tells her that if the shoe fits…. Erika also complains that with Cat, everything always seems to be about Cat. Lynda gives Erika a bit of a reprimand, saying that Erika started all this by “getting off on your high horse.” Cat, who seems a bit shaken, says she feels like Erika is trying to verbally “annihilate” her. With that, Cat heads for the exits.
My take on this whole incident: While Cat can certainly be quite crass at times, she wasn’t being that way tonight – Erika obviously has an axe to grind with Cat, and Erika’s behavior here (she completely instigated all of this) was not appropriate at all. The other ladies seem to be in agreement with me, and express those sentiments to Erika. At the door, Stacie asks Cat to stay, but Cat is determined to take off. Cat, who is obviously not her normal self these days due to the continued absence of her husband and the recent suicide of her close friend, is in tears and just wants to get the hell out of there.
Then as Cat is about the head out the door, Erika comes into the foyer and tells Cat that she still wants the two of them to get to know each other and that they’ve just gotten off on the wrong foot. Erika further offers up the ol’ half-apology: “I apologize if you felt that I was attacking you.” But then Erika chides Cat for allegedly giving Erika “body language.” The two are about to start arguing again when Lynda intervenes and suggests it’s probably best for Cat to depart with her daughters (which finally occurs).
At Mary’s house the next day, Mary is in the living room with husband Rich (the reincarnation of Gary Cole’s Bill Lumbergh boss character from Office Space, as noted before) and daughter Lolly (age 23), who has just quit her job as an “executive assistant.” Lolly says that she doesn’t want a deadline for moving out of Mary’s house since Lolly is now unemployed. Rich seems willing to allow Lolly to stay until sometime in the spring, but he also clearly feels strongly that she needs to be looking to get out on her own. Rich presses Lolly on her future employment plans. Lolly says she wants to “make art make some money for me,” such as through painting. Rich tells her that art is more of a hobby, and that she needs to focus on getting a stable job. Mary, however, is more supportive of the whole “art” thing.
Segment 3: We’re at the office of the aforementioned DC city councilman, David Catania. He’s meeting with Paul Wharton and Stacie’s friend Erika (i.e. the Cat hater). Lynda is also attending the meeting, along with Stacie, her husband Jason and Mary. Cat even shows up in the same room with Erika! Cat then hilariously makes the rounds and says hello to everyone except Erika, who has then mean-ass little look on her face. Sorry, folks, but Erika has definitely made a rotten impression upon me this episode.
The odd premise of this meeting is to discuss the issue of gay marriage (and specifically, the “Marriage Equality Bill” – which I take it must be a new law that DC may enact). It was revealed in earlier episodes that Paul is gay, BTW. Lynda says that she’s a big supporter of gay marriage being permitted under the law (and “not just because I have a gay sister,” she says/reveals). Ironically, Cat and Erika seems to be on the same page on this one, both supporting gay marriage.
Mary expresses that she doesn’t feel this issue has anything to do with her, to which Paul Wharton is APPALLED! Hey Paul: Until you start getting involved in issues that affect ME and not you (such as the bullying epidemic in schools, drug and alcohol use by kids and teens, etc.), then don’t you sit there and tell me that I’m a bad person because I really couldn’t give a rat’s ass about an issue that does not affect me, such as gay marriage. CHECK THAT, dude. OK, I’ve vented (and I generally like Paul, but his sentiment sort of pissed me off right there).
Stacie’s husband Jason seems generally opposed to gay marriage being legalized, saying that he thinks marriage should mean “one man, one woman.” Stacie indicates that she agrees with Jason. BTW, Stacie and Jason are both devoted democrats and Obama supporters, as has been revealed on prior episodes. I think it’s great that dems, repubs and Independents alike can all disagree on the gay marriage issue. Myself, I’m an Independent and likely well to the right of Stacie and Jason on most issues, but on this particular issue, I’d have to say that they are actually to the right of me (and I to the left of them). And disagreement doesn’t make anybody wrong or evil. Rather, it’s what America’s all about. But I digress.
Anyway, there’s a very clear tension between Wharton and Jason over this issue. Paul all but calls Jason a homophobe over his opposition to gay marriage. Jason to his credit remains calm and says that folks should not start tossing about terms like that with everyone who disagrees with them on the gay marriage issue. Great point. Calling Jason, one heck of a nice dude, a homophobe because he happens to believe that marriage should always be between a man and a woman (even if I may not agree) is just totally off-base on Wharton’s part.
Next, Stacie and Erika are meeting Mary for dinner. Mary (as we’ve seen before) has apparently already been hitting the juice pretty good and seems a bit drunk as Stacie and Erika arrive. Gay marriage is again the topic of discussion. Meantime Paul Wharton and Lynda are hanging out for cocktails. The show then starts going back and forth between these two sites as all of the participants talk about the Erika-Cat incident at Stacie’s house. Most everyone seems in general agreement: Cat is off her game lately due to a lot of stress, including the near-constant absence of her husband.
Segment 4: We’re back at Michaele Salahi’s hotel suite, where she’s telling personal assistant Jen about Michaele’s alleged cheerleading days back when she was in her 20’s. Michaele ironically starts discussing the possibility of enhancing her boobs (ironic since I’ve commented recently that I don’t see how she can possibly appear in Playboy sporting her current assets).
Segment 5: Tareq and Michaele Salahi are meeting with Virginia State Delegate (whatever that means/is), Dave Albo. They are talking about the possible reopening of the Salahis’ winery. Tareq is complaining about excessive government regulations (coming from the local county) on local wineries, such as not being to be open past 6 p.m. and limited number of winery customers at one time. The Salahis says that these rules will severely impinge upon their ability to have social events at their winery, which events, they say, will be the bread and butter of their winery income (WOW, the Salahis actually making sense for once!).
At Mary’s house, she’s hittin’ the wine again as she talks to daughter Lolly in the kitchen. They start talking about gay marriage (what else?!!!). Mary says she wants an opportunity to retract her statement (which pissed off Paul Wharton) about not feeling that gay marriage is an issue that has much to do with her. [C’mon, Mary – stick your guns for once!]
Cat is meeting Ted Gibson’s celebrity colorist, Jason Backe (as revealed in prior episodes, Ted and Jason are a gay couple). [Ted, BTW, owns the recently opened Ted Gibson Salon in DC]. Cat reveals that the gay marriage bill apparently passed (this was late 2009, and I’m surprised I don’t recall this – I’m assuming the bill was a DC-wide law, since DC is basically a state even though technically not having the complete legal status of a state).
Cat looks like she’s wearing a Bigfoot/Yeti hide on her chest (where’s Bob Barker & the PETA folks when you need them? ;) ). And SO, the conversation moves to – Take a Big Guess – GAY MARRIAGE (Again!). Cat also talks about wanting to leave the DC suburbs, which she complains are littered with ladies in spandex walking their dogs around. Then they discuss the Salahis and the weird, perplexing nature of their general behavior (hear hear!).
Segment 6: Tareq and Michaele are showing up at the home of Matt Carson, a “writer.” It’s revealed that the Salahis are looking to Matt to write a “tell-all” book about their lives and marriage (apparently they’ve gotten wind of Cat’s upcoming book and want a little taste to wet their beaks as well). Tareq’s proposed title? “Wine, War and Roses.” This dumbass goof-looking Matt chimes in, “yeah, that’s it!” BUT there is conflict between the parties! The Salahis are just looking for a ghostwriter, while this Matt wants his name to be at least somewhat associated with authoring this book. At the end of the day, says Michaele, she just wants the book to have a “happy ending.” END OF EPISODE.
Upcoming episode(s): OUTRAGEOUS! It was publicized all over the Net by Bravo that tonight was the Season Finale of this series, but yet it OBVIOUSLY WAS NOT. There’s still at least one episode left, which appears to at least in part get into the Salahis’ party crashing at the White House state dinner last November. Which is fine, but Bravo disingenuously and falsely putting it out there that this was the finale (obviously to garner extra viewers) is so completely Bush League. I will never cover again another Bravo reality series. Never.