Daniel Craig Says James Bond's Not Gay, & George Clooney's Sister Says George Ain't Gay. But Whom Am I Gonna Get to Speak Up on My Behalf?

Both of those stories (links below) were from late last week.  Since for some reason the act of affirming that one's not gay seems to be all the rage in Hollywood right now, I'm left to ponder what high-profile public figure can I get to put in a word or two for me on my sexuality?

When one doesn't exactly know any high-profile public figures to begin with, it makes for a pretty tall chore that I'm facing over here.  But one time at rat trap I did talk to a dude whom I swore was William H. Macy at a bar (although he denied that it was him). 

What do you think of the chances that ol' Willie might help me out if I can get him on the blower? And would it make any difference to this whole equation whether or not the particular joint in question was a gay bar?  And what if I was sporting a pompadour and a pink cumberbun at the time?

http://abcnews.go.com/blogs/entertainment/2012/11/seven-things-to-know-about-george-clooneys-sister/
http://www.dailymail.co.uk/tvshowbiz/article-2230437/Daniel-Craig-insists-NEVER-gay-Bond--chemistry-Javier-Bardem-sparks-speculation-007s-sexuality.html