Just look at this freak (pictured at top and below). He holds some sort of world record for quickest consumption of a light bulb (33.86 seconds). He swallows swords. He can be seen on YouTube spiking a damn bike spoke through his bicep. And he was recently auditioning for a gig at the Coney Island Freak Show. He had it all. But now he's thrown it all away faster than a big batch of incandescent light bulbs at the White House...
He's 22-year-old R.J. Williams, and cops in NYC say they've finally nailed this freak after a mostly bungled run of some 11 bank jobs over the past few months (netting the freak a rather putrid score of only $14,000 total) (link at bottom). This freak's latest crazy caper allegedly involved him trying to knock over a Brooklyn bank that he had just tried to rob unsuccessfully the previous week!
Not such a bright move for the bulb eater, as cops say bank workers quickly recognized this sideshow freak and scared him off. A few workers followed the freak around the corner, where Mr. Edison's big getaway plan was reportedly to pull a fast one by changing his shirt!
And like most circus freaks, some balls on this one: New shirt in tow, he allegedly next sashayed his way right past a couple of street cops as if no one would be the wiser. "He appeared to be texting -- this guy came walking straight past us," one of the cops told the New York Post.
Never ones to look a gift freak in the mouth, cops tossed this freak's bulb-eatin' behind in the can -- where's he gonna have to change his diet: "I don't think they serve 60-watt bulbs as prison food in Rikers," crowed another cop. But a shank through the shoulder, methinks they can muster up. Keep an eye on YouTube.
http://www.nypost.com/p/news/local/dim_bulb_1KmvQWefjjKYCKlfk4Kb8L
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